Shameless_Self_Promashan ;-)™©℠

This blogs has moved to -> http://shameless-self-promotion.org/

2006-07-23T19:15:00.000-07:00

I had kept the blog for nearly 2 years, using it as a repository for personal anecdotes, travelogues, and the occasional flight of fiction—all of which I hoped will let me express myself. And then I realized something: Blogspot wasn't helping me. It was infact creating problems. I have found that Govt of India is right in banning Blogspot. Blogspot is a pain. It reduces productivity. Plus it is down for most of the time. No significant improvment in last many years. I am sick of blogspot now. So I have decided to say bye bye to blogspot. No more blogging now. Sorry friends. Now some may wonder is it true that I am closing my blog? Yes I am closing my blogspot blog but uou can visit to my new blog address. http://shameless-self-promotion.org/ Yes I have moved to new blog address. My own blog. So be there.

Blog blockade will be lifted in 48 hours

2006-07-19T19:27:00.000-07:00

The following is a cnversation between me and one of my net pal from Pakistan. My pal is politically active and wants peace between India and Pakistan. Infact he came India but dude to Visa restrictions he could not come to Chandigarh and we could not meet. Afzal: How r u bro Me: am fine sir, how r u and hows bhabhi and niece Afzal: Bhabhi si quite angry with your niece and your niece is crying. Me: Oh what happened?? Afzal: Your niece was aying some bad words, abuses, so your bhabhi got angry and she made your niece taste some red chilli powder Me (Shocked): WHAT???? you know the kid is only 3 years Afzal: Yes dear, but this is not good...she knows many bad words at this age ME: But who tought her all these bad words??? I guess elders??? I dont think a kid can invent bad words Afzal: Yes I know but then we must do some thing to stop her Me: Do you think she will stop?? Afzal: Yes Me: no she will always remember these words and she will use them, not infront of you, but some where else Afzal: mmmm yes you are right Replace Afzal with Govt of India and Me witha comon blogger. Go against established norms and rules and Govt will ban you. The health minister thot that banning cigerettes in movies will reduce smoking. It will never happen. The Govt of India like all the other Govts in world thinks that by creating unnecessary issues they will be able to divert the attention of "aam aadmi" or "common man" from real issues like rising prices of food and housing, expensive education and low quality clinical facilities. Once Adnan asked me, "You have democracy in your country. What does this means?" I said, "We choose our leaders so that they can cheat us."

in and out and in and out and in...

2006-07-16T23:25:00.000-07:00

In Maths when we add three trailing dots to any expression we mean to say the expression continues. Fore next few days, I dont know the exact count, I will be partially busy in moving my office to new location. This time I am taking a risk in much bigger way and sense. Will be paying more rent, nearly double, will be more paying for everything else. But I wanted to take this risk and wanted to givemy best shot to my venture. I still lack in managerial skills and hope I will improve myself and my company will grow. Wish me best of luck. I will be in and out of my blog but will keep up with others. Wish me best of luck for my venture.

Dream Come True

2006-07-12T04:09:00.000-07:00

Guys are attracted by bare bodies and one bare body that always made me drool is this bike. Its well known among my near and dear ones that I am crazy about any model of bike that looks like Bullet 350. Yesterday my freind finally purchased this bike. He purchased this bike just beacause it was me who was feeding his brain with following "This machine is awesome." "Girls love guys who have bullet." "You will look smart on this bike." "I really dont have enough money otherwise this wud have been my bike.." This is true. Actually he will leave for USA any time and I have set my eyes on this bike. As soon as he signed all the papers and got hold of bike it was me like a kid, "I want to drive it or else..." This bike is different from all the bikes available in India.

Oldest and still in production bike.
very few changes in last more than 50 years
not an economic bike but if given option majority of MEN will go for Bullet 350.
the bike is (in)famous for its sound
Only made in India bike that comes with 350CC of raw power. Royal enfield also manufactures 500CC bikes. A typical Maruti car is just 800CC. Compare with 500CC bike.

Bike is bit heavy and gears are on right side and break on left side. This is toally opposite to normal Japanese bikes available in India. All metal body and bare engine makes the machine look damn SEXY. I am just waiting for some of my loans to be cleared and I will be purchasing this bike. The only drawback of this bike is, poor mileage. My Hero Honda Splendour gives me a mileage of 75+ and this bike at its best will give mileage of 40+. But who cares. There is a saying in Punjabi. "Nakhre wi sohni mutiyaar de change lage de" "One who is bautiful, is bearable." Update I dont know how to play Tambola and I won the very first game of Tambola I played in my life. I won by "Full House". Now whats that I dont know. But I won the prizes which were baught by a pretty girl and how rude of me, I even didnt say thanks to that lady. Missed a chance to win some one.

Kuch to hai ke baki hai nishan hamara

2006-07-11T21:21:00.000-07:00

This is from one of my old post at Bewajah. Some poet, I dont remeber the name or the complete poem, said this, Mit gaye duniya se misr-o-roman, Kuch to hai ke baki hain nishan hamara. Means, The Egyptian and Romans are no more but there is some thing that we are still here. To all those who want to divide my motherland, I will say F*** OFF. I am really feeling sorry for those killed in J&K. These were my emotions when some so called "Jehadis" or "Crusaders" killed some innocent people including a 9 year old kid in a remote village in Jammu and Kashmir. Yesterday I felt the same when 8 people were killed in Lal Chowk Srinagar of which 6 were tourist. I dont know what threat tourist pose to Jehadis. Then by the evening 7 blasts in Mumbai. 174 people (till now officially told) lost their lives. I am totally against the non violence policies of Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi but I also dont support these acts of cowardness. Kill inncent people who pose no threat to any one. These people dont even pose any thereat to the govt whome they elect. Its not first incident in India but I wish this may awake our leadership and force them to take some strong actions. My friend Sumi and her hubby are ok. All my sympathies are with kith and kin of those who lost their lives.

Happy B'day to my one and only Virtual Girl Friend

2006-07-10T12:01:00.000-07:00

She: Will you change your religion for me? Me: You know I dont believe in all this GOD Stuff.., She: Even then... Me: I am what I am, I cant change myself, if you want me you will have to take me as I am She: I love you and I dont want you to change. She accepted me as I am which unfortunatley some other didnt. Happy B'day to Mah. I miss you Mah.

Anyone's guide to breakfast

2006-07-06T19:17:00.000-07:00

After the doctors discovered some precious stones in my friend's kidney I was forced to think about my own eating habbits. I dont want my body to start producing stones. This was the time for last 4 years experience of cooking to be reused. So after discussing some design issues and looking for the names of countries that start with U I decided to blog something about my breakfast which for last 3-4 months have seen many changes. In the month of March my breakfast was Corn Flakes with milk. Not so yummy but good breakfast. Only problem. It involved sugar and milk. I can drink shakes but milk. in my niece' words, "EEEWWWWWW" Anyhow. Then I discovered that the large cubicle obejct in my kithcen was infact a fridge and I stocked my fav fruit jam and Amul butter. Now this is my recipie of brekfast. Apply butter on one slice and jam on 2nd slice and join these and grill it. The heat will melt butter and jam will also get some heat. The crisp sandwitch if made correctly tastes wow. Then I found one day that I can also make Paneer or Cheese Sandwitch. Stuff the bread with paneer. Grill it. Kool. Then in between I was enjoying Paranthaas. I am gonna put an authorative post on Paranthas. Now a days am eating sprouts in breakfast. Sprouts are good for health. Easy to prepare. Look at this foto This is a box made of VIRGIN (WOW) foodgrade plastic which was intended to be used as box fo my Utterly Butterly Delecious Amul butter brick. This stock consists green soy or Mung/Moong dal and Chickpea or Kaale Chane. The process of sprouting is too easy Visit this hyperlink -> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sprouting#How_to_sprout Or read following (Straight from Wikipedia)

How to sprout

The main requirements for successful sprouting are moisture, warmth, and (in most cases) some indirect sunlight. Provided a few guidelines are followed, it is remarkably easy to obtain good results requiring very little time, effort or space. Initially a small handful of seeds should be run under a tap, then left at room temperature (between 13 and 21 degrees Celsius) in the sprouting vessel. Although a number of items can be utilized for this task ranging from a jam jar with a piece of net curtain secured over its rim by an elastic band to specially designed ‘tiered’ sprouters, it is highly important that the vessel is free draining, for waterlogged sprouts will quickly rot. The seeds will soon swell, and within a day or two begin germination. They should then be rinsed at least twice a day, possibly even three or four times in hot weather or they may quickly sour. After around four to five days they will have grown to around two or three inches in length and will be suitable for use. If left much longer they will begin to develop leaves and can become bitter tasting, although the growth process can be halted by placing them in the fridge until needed.

Although sprouting of mung beans is generally successful once a routine has been developed, it is not uncommon for beginners to experience failures, although these are often due to the following causes which can be easily remedied once recognized;

Seeds being allowed to dry out
Seeds being waterlogged
Temperature too high or too low
Insufficient rinsing
Dirty equipment

Mung beans can be sprouted either in light or dark conditions, eg, an airing cupboard. Those sprouted in the dark (as in the case of the shop-bought Chinese Bean Sprouts) will be crisper in texture and whiter, but have less nutritional content. Growing in full sunlight however should be avoided as this may cause the beans to overheat or dry out. Subjecting the sprouts to pressure, for example, by placing a weight on top of them in their sprouting container, will result in larger, crunchier sprouts similar to those sold in Chinese groceries.

Sprouts purchased in supermarkets tend to be mung or alfalfa cultures.

Now how to consume. Many ways.

Simply add a dash of lime juice and salt.
Heat some oil, just half a table spoon in a pan. Put a teaspoon of cumin/jeera/zeera seeds and as soon as the seeds start popping up add grounded red chilli powder. Add sprouts. Slat to taste. Mix well. Cover the pan with lid. Cook for 1-2 minutes on slow flame. Remove the lid and sprinkle some Garam Masala. Cover for one minute and after that one minute...eat them.
Finely chop tomatoes and green chillies. Mix with sprouts. Sprinkle Sodium Chloride(NaCl) or common salt and black pepper. Add a dash of lime juice. Garnish with coriander leaves.

The nutritional value of sprouts is much higher than normal pulses. As sprouts are not cooked on higher temprature they retain the vitamins, minerals, fats and watever the dieticians call them. I just like sprouts bit fried. My mom used to make sprouts and use them while cooking vegetables like Bottle Gourd/Ghiya. I am planning to punch in my experience with Paranthaas. Yummyy.

Name a country thats startes with "U"?

2006-07-05T20:18:00.000-07:00

And still US rules the world...amazing

Principles of Design

2006-07-04T23:46:00.000-07:00

The title may be misleading for some. I am not going to talk about graphic designing or database designing or web page designing, all of these are very simple compared to Software Designing. When I was a fresher in IT Industry I used to think, "Ha, whats so tough and complex about desiging a software?" Now after finishing a product I think, "Wait I guess I can improve the design". The technology is changing at fast pace. I finish some thing using simple Javascript and hear a new word DOM Scripting and then I do my next app using DOM and here comes AJAX. Now when I am doing AJAX I find it Web2.0 making rounds. How do these technologies affect a software design? IMO, these help in imporving design. I recently did a small database driven app. I finished the prototype and asked client to review it. As usual and as it happens in most cases, the client REALISED that there were many things missing in the prototype. And we again sat across the table did some brainstorming and result was complete overhaul in design. I was about to use AJAX in prototype and good I didnt use due to time constraints. If I had used it the client wud have REALISED more design issues. Now as my prototype is lying in trash I am proud of my ready to use anywhere components that I have designed in my 6 years of professional lief. These components allow me to sit idle for 6 hours and then finish the design in 2 hours which others will do in 8 hours. But I had put aroudn 6 years in desigining these components and I feel one thing, "Software design and development is an evolving process." Keep iterating till you get the best design. Normally this never happens. The major factor that hampers good design is time and budget. We design and the test and the evaluate it and redesign it. In this process the most valuable resource, the time, is consumed. Even after careful requirement and analysis and freezing the specifications I always find the design can be improved. I guess I will leave this post here. I will read it and study it and surely find some more points. hmm

rain rain come again

2006-07-03T22:57:00.000-07:00

Temprature 34 degree celsius Humidity 71% Heat Index is 44 degree celsius Send me rain Where is monsoon O monsoon come soon Update Evening News: 2nd day and rain hits the selected (read VIP areas) sectors of Chandigarh. This is a consipiration by opposition party (I dont know who is in opposotion and I even dont care, I just hjave to blame some one). The opposition thinks that it can demotivate me and my supporters and clients (who are either enjoying ACs or live in some european or american country) and I will be a looser. Yes I am a looser. I am about to loose my wieght.

The server made a boo-boo!

2006-07-03T04:05:00.000-07:00

Today, the day 3rd jyly 2006, will be rembered in the history as a day when lot of servers made boo boo. Morning, Addu reports some strange thing with Orkut. Afternoon, Addu reports that Blogger is down. By evening, I see this Blogger going down is not new thing. Same is with Orkut. They deny the server any donut. But the things me and Addu found on Orkut made us think if we can exploit Orkut. I have put Agent Smith on the job. Agent Smith was part of Matrix but he could easily manipulate it. Why do softwares go wrong or behave abnormally? According to me there is no software which can either satisfy a User or a Developer. I as a developer find n number of loopholes when I design softwares. But my client as an enduser is more than happy with that buggy piece of code. And atlast I have to give him that piece of code beaouse a) Time b) Budget is always less for any project. When I tried to deliver the best quality software I faced a) Time constraints b) Bidget Problem C) Unsatisfied client and last but not least d) Loss in the business So, my biz brain tells me if the client is happy with defected piece of software let him be happy. Client satisfaction is first. Now some tips and tricks to make servers say boo boo or find usability flaws. Register with http://wordpress.com and after a while delete your account. Now try registering again with same email ID. For this trick U need 2 different Gmail IDs. Login to Gmail and open a new browser window or tab. Open gmail again in this tab/window and log out while you have Gmail opened in previous window. Now in this current tab again ope Gmail and login to 2nd ID. You can browse mails in both tabs/windows. On Flickr send some requests too fastly. Try to rotate Photos and simlutaneously click on image carasoule on right side. On Orkut you just browse and server will be denied donuts anytime. I even faced problem with Yahoo! Too many things.

My weekend

2006-07-02T22:37:00.000-07:00

In comments to my last post (that gives more proof to strengthen my theory) , Keshi wished that my weekend was good. It was one of those weekends which I cant call worst even wehn majority of the time I was down coz I met mom and dad. Mom and dad as part of their secret plan wanted to raid my place and find out what I was doing. But they failed. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Saturday afternon I broke all my previous records of sneezing. This time my score was 5 sneezes per minute but the time duration was less. Just 5 minutes. My lanlord advised me to search for "sneezing competition" on Google. I was down after those 5 minutes and one of my project got lagged. whole afternoon I was lying. The weather was hot and humid and I wished something just killed me while I was lying on bed. "Koi sagar dil ko behlata nahi... bekhudi me bhi karaar aata nahi" By the evening I had taken bath a) in the morning with cold running water b) in afternoon with sweat even when I was right under the fan c) in the evening with cold running water By 9 PM my niece called me and threatened me with "DIRE CONSEQUENCES" if I didnt get her a VCD. I wasnt well so cudnt get her the CD. Sat night, I was just turning sides and could not sleep. Some how slept and sunday morning I did some laundry and at 10 AM again the sneeze attack. I was down again on bed. Somehow managed to have breakfast. Suddenly around 12:30 my sis called me. "Hey bro, dont tell mom and dad that I told you that they are coming to see you" Cool. Sisters are good. And around 1:30 dad called me, "Where are you son?" He wasnt surprised when I told my dad I was waiting for him only. "I know you have a sister. Your reliable source of information." Mom and dad straightaway went to cousin's place. They thot I was well preapared for the raid. On the contrary I was lying on bed and wished if I could replace my head with some one else's head. Around 2pm I gathered some courage and decided to do some work but could not. Long Man was online but he was worried. His last night booze act has landed up him in a trouble. Some how I did some coding and around 4PM I was on my way to see mom and dad. Weather was hot and humid and I wished some thing really killed me. Good I didnt move to Chennai and I was not in Ludhiana. Both places are miles apart but still too hot and humid. When mom and dad left Nanmun was after me. "Chacha ji, you will have to play with me." I cant deny her but tried to. I failed. She knows all the tricks. Cry. Shout. Cajole. Threat. She won. By the end of the weekend this is my conclusion. D'ont fall in love.

more proof that people copy bollywood

2006-07-02T09:47:00.000-07:00

I was amazed to see this site. http://www.itwofs.com/ The site gives songs and their rip offs. I mean Original (Hindi) Songs and then Rip Offs. Now if you believe in my theory you will understand how much this world hates Indian talent.

Happy B'day Sumi

2006-06-30T14:32:00.000-07:00

Happy B'day to Sumi. She is offline now big time, cellphone not working, not coming online, no internet around her place, sad. May she get a good job + her cell phone may start working + she may also get a unlimited broadband + she may send my Cargos :P. Happy B'day Da.

We need infrastructure for a love story

2006-06-29T12:04:00.000-07:00

I faced a power outage today. My UPS gave up after 3 hours. And after that my love with my PC was over. I was acting like a typical LUSTY man who will dump the woman after CONSUMING her. I left my PC and was out for atleast 4-5 hours. Read some French. Went to pizza hut with my frend. Wanted to do some NSTP but could not. Over all the day was so so. hmm some one is online...its Fri June 30, 00:37 hrs

208 Posts

2006-06-27T20:22:00.000-07:00

208 posts Too much of Shameless Self Promotion. Thanks readers. This is for all my female readers and And for guys Keep visiting my blog. BTW I just notice Bewajah also crossed 150. Half year old. Good Job Chaitanya and Vani (Although both ladies do nothing else than scolding me, cute innocent charming guy.)

60-40 day

2006-06-27T08:44:00.000-07:00

This was not so good or not so bad day. Atlast I again joined the Gym and day started with ego war. The gym instructor or so called Coach w/out even noting any detail and asking about any medical history put me and Bhupi to do some exercises. He shouted this to me and Bhupi. You 2 new comers, I want you to do cycling for atleast 10 mins and no slow motions and NO BREAKS in between any exercise. My last experience with any Gym or exercising routine has told me that a) I can easily get a good physique w/out over burdening my body b) I dont need muscles coz I wont be able to maintain them I tried to contradict the coach by telling him bout my past experience but he was not lisning to me. Ego. He is a coach and am a NEW COMER. F*** Then one of my client who knew am only working on his project and who have again gave me 2 more assignments with *HIGHER* priority wanted results for all 3 by evening. Some times being alone sucks and this was the time it sucked. S*** Then in afternoon one of my prank tried to boomrang me. One of the character of my play refused to step down of the stage and was causing lot of trouble to me. I am a bad guy but I have good friends. By the evening things got sorted out. This concluding episode, I wish it was concluding, gave me a lesson. Do write a good climax for your stories. In late evening I was trying to cook dinner for myself and a) put too much red chilli in "tadka" which was already having enough of green chillies. The "daal" was real spicy b) Put too much water in Jeera Rice and nealy messed up the dish. But I have mangoes stocked in my fridge. So by the end of the day I had this lesson. Nothing can replace mangoes and good friends.

Brand India.

2006-06-27T08:20:00.000-07:00

Hindi hai hum, Hindustani hain hum. Brand India.

2 things

2006-06-26T21:51:00.000-07:00

First Mittal & Arcelar Mittal Steels is now the no 1 steel company. Anyone can tell what's the role of steel in Infrastructure development. This merger may or may not help India in general but it again proved some Indians (including me) are tough nuts to crack. Second, Dravid's 68 draw third test Another tough nut to crack or I say to bold. Rahul Dravid better known as Jammie is real tough nut but some times he behaves like "Indian cricket team". Keep it up guys. I know you are learning from me.

Beauty lies in the eyes of beholder

2006-06-26T06:35:00.000-07:00

What can be the reaction to some one's problem like, mmmm, sneezes or alergy. Scene 1 ------------------------------------------------ Kumar Chetan: I am sneezing Kumar Chetan: Copy Cat: ohh waht happened Kumar Chetan: @ 3.2 sneezer per min Copy Cat: good score Kumar Chetan: ys Kumar Chetan: m improving Copy Cat: good Scene 2 ------------------------------------------------ Kumar Chetan: Mr Anderson this is not good Long Man: wat smith..? Kumar Chetan: I am sneezing @ 3.2 sneezer per min Kumar Chetan: 32 sneezes in 10 mins Long Man: WOW.. congrats.. Scene 3 ------------------------------------------------ Kumar Chetan: I am not well, I am sneezing @ 3.2 sneezer per min Kumar Chetan: 32 sneezes in 10 mins Mr. Client: oh wow, U know stats, good ur improving in analysis, keep it up Kumar Chetan: yes, thanks for motivation Conclusion: Beauty lies in the eyes of beholder and you can always put glasses on eyes to make thing look beautiful. Quick Update: Time 23:24 hrs. Rate of sneezing decreased to 1.6 Sneezes per min.

I am the best

2006-06-24T05:21:00.000-07:00

I cant be more shameless than this. I compiled this sms on my cell and sent it to 32 ppl accross the India "Did u call me? Fwd this sms and count how many ppl respond. good prank" I am still recieving call and msgs "No" "No, I dint" "for what?" "no but I will call u soon" I have been playing too many pranks now a days. Copy cat will agree with me. I guess I am going wild. I need to apply breaks. PS: I guess there are no limits to be more shameless. Thinking of another prank for next weekend.

A couplet by Manzoor Ahmed

2006-06-23T00:00:00.000-07:00

While looking for some thing in my old diaries I found this couplet (sher) by Manzoor Ahmed jinke liye mar mar ke jiye hum, kya paya unse manzoor kuch ruswai, kuch badnami, humko mili suagaat ke naam For whome I was ready to die they just gave me bad name and depression as a gift. Relate this to an IT guy's life. The clients for whome I worked overnight at the end didnt accept my delivered product. SAD but true.

Welcome back after break

2006-06-22T22:28:00.000-07:00

This is a must read -> http://kadnan.blogspot.com/2006/06/mian-and-bibi.html If U r too lazy to click the link here it is Anything in this post after the following dotted line is from Addu's blog and buzz him if u r offended dotted line follows ................................................................................... Mian and Bibi Nasty but hilarious!!.My friend Saad sent me this today.Have fun:) Mian sahib wanted to raise money for his party, and on being told that there was a fortune in horse racing, decided to purchase one and enter it in the races. However at the local auction, the going price for a horse was very high so he ended up buying a donkey instead. He figured that since he had it he might as well go ahead and enter it in the races. To his surprise, the donkey came in third! The next day the local paper said: "MIAN'S ASS SHINES". Mian sahib was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and this time it won. The paper read: "MIAN'S ASS OUT IN FRONT" His wife was so upset with this kind of publicity that she ordered Mian sahib not to enter the donkey in another race. The paper headline read: "WIFE SCRATCHES MIAN'S ASS" This was too much for Mrs. Mian. So she ordered Mian sahib to get rid of the donkey. Mian sahib decided to give it to Benazir. The paper headline the next day read: "BENAZIR TAKES MIAN'S ASS". Followed by another on the next day: "NOW BENAZIR HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN". All the opposition leaders got very upset at this kind of publicity. They informed Benazir that she would have to get rid of the donkey. So she sold it to a farmer for Rs.500. Next day the headline read: "BENAZIR SELLS HER ASS FOR Rs.500" This was too much for the veteran opposition leader, Nawabzada Nasrullah Khan, so he ordered Benazir to buy back the donkey, lead it to the plains where it could run wild and free. Next day, the headline in the paper read: "BENAZIR ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE"

I am taking a break from blogging...

2006-06-22T19:54:00.000-07:00

I am taking a break from blogging... till next post. Evil is live spelled reverse. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

more proofs

2006-06-21T19:45:00.000-07:00

I have got more prrofs that Hollywood is copying our Bollywood using Time Machine See and compare following images

Mystic Lyrics

2006-06-21T04:09:00.000-07:00

Kise aakhiy majnu nu, oye teri laila dikhdi kaali we majnu ne jawab ditta teri akh na wekhan wali e ved wi chitta te kuran wi chitti wich syahi rakh ditti kaali we gulam farid jithe ankhaiyan lagiyan uthe kya gori kya kali we Some one said, o Majnu your Laila is black. Majnu replied, o my dear, you dont have the eyes to look at Laila. Vedas are white and so is Quran. Its the black ink that puts words of wisdom on white colour. Ghulam Farid in love nothing is black or white. Right now am listning to a Sinhali song. I think its Sinhli as the DJ who remixed is from Sri Lanka. I just understand first line "Mata aloke gena devi sansaryne" Enuff for me. Its the music that attracted me. I have one Tamil song. "Raj roja sola..." I like the lady's voice But lyrics that appeal me are mystic. The song "Hotel California" by Eagles is mystic. One can derive so many meanings from the lyrics. Then lyrics of a qawwali by Ustaad Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan. Simple but deep meaning. The list of lyrics I hate include every lyric from the triangluar love story movies, new coming Punjabi albums and all the pop stuff. IMO Gulzar is the best lyricist available to bollywood. One of my fav lyrics by Gulzaar is "Tujh se naraaz nahi zindagi" from movie "Masoom". Its the interpretation by individual which gives the song its meaning.

A long good bye

2006-06-21T03:21:00.000-07:00

This is happening for last too many days. copy cat copies my ideas as soon as I think of them and then some times copy cat will blog those ideas. I rarely enjoy English songs. But I really love some of English songs. Hotel California by Eagles and A Long Goodbye by Ronan Keating. The latter is my fav and I am giving the lyrics. I have heard these 2 songs n number of times in continuation and still can't humm the lyrics correctly. This is a kind of problem which I face with all songs. I can't hum the lyrics correctly. Read the lyrics. "The Long Goodbye" I know they say if you love somebody You should set them free (so they say) But it sure is hard to do Yeah, it sure is hard to do And I know they say if they don't come back again Then it's meant to be (so they say) But those words ain't pulling me through Cos I'm still in love with you I spend each day here waiting for a miracle But it's just you and me going through the mill (climbin' up a hill) [Chorus] This is the long goodbye Somebody tell me why Two lovers in love can't make it Just what kind of love keeps breaking a heart? No matter how hard I try You're gonna make me cry Come on, baby, it's over, let's face it All that's happening here is a long goodbye Sometimes I ask my heart did we really Give our love a chance (just one more chance) and I know without a doubt I turned it inside out And if we walked away would make more sense (only self defense) But it tears me up inside Just to think we still could try How long must we keep riding on a carousel Going round and round and never getting anywhere? (on a wing and prayer) [Chorus] This is the long goodbye Somebody tell me why Two lovers in love can't make it Just what kind of love keeps breaking a heart? No matter how hard I try You're gonna make me cry Come on, baby, it's over, Let's face it All that's happening here is the long goodbye [Chorus x2] The long goodbye The long goodbye This is the long goodbye Someone please tell me why Are you ever coming back again Are you ever coming back again Are you ever coming back again Guess I'm never coming back again

Work area of a sagittarius

2006-06-20T04:16:00.000-07:00

Once I met a a sweeet grl named Deep . I was not well and she asked me, "How are you Chetan?" and she forwarded her hand. Simple handshake. I touched her hand and jumped out of bed and said, "WOW, I am feeling new energy. Be mine Deep." and then a brawl between 2-3 guys that who will get Deep. Deep was already engaged and it was all fun. She was a sagi like me and she said some thing which entered my subconcious. According to her Astrological knowledge, Sagis can never keep things organised on their desks, their beds will be always messed up, room like ummm, U got the general Idea. Below are 2 photos of my desk. Click the link and go to Flickr and read the notes

BTW I dont believe in astrology and my dad is a known astrologer. Some of cool predictions about me

I have atleast 2 Love Affairs in my life. And the 2nd will end up in marriage. After waiting too long for the 1st one I have decided to drop the idea of 1st one, I am now waiting for the 2nd one. But I am totally against marriage (till date)
When I will be 28 I will be surrounded by GIRLS. I am doubtful on this. Whether I will be working with girls? Whether I will have too many GFs?
I will never face any financial problem. That is if I want I can buy some thing. This is not true. Although I wanted to buy a phone less than 6K INR and purchased 2 phones @ 11K INR each. Whoa!!! 2 cell phones @ 11K each. I am still dont believe this.
Will never go to abroad. CRAP! I can go to any country that can bear me as a tourist.
and last not least. Will have a very beautiful wife. Not possible now. I broke up with Aishwarya Rai 3 years back and there is no chance that I will marry that fat lady.

The time machine

2006-06-19T01:39:00.000-07:00

I have a theory. The directors in Hollywood have designed a time machine. They use it to travel into future. Then they visit India and watch our Hindi movies. Then they travle back to their own time and copy our script. This is the only theory that can say that the following Krish Poster is Genuine and the Daredevil poster is a copy. I hope the Indian Film makers association will support my theory.

Broken and on a break

2006-06-18T02:25:00.000-07:00

Whosoever is delighted in solitude is either a wild beast or a god. ~ Aristotle Suddenly I want 2 b alone. whoa!!!

A new collegue

2006-06-17T13:26:00.000-07:00

This guy wants to join my team. He is job less. Shall I appoint him?

Happy B'day to Long Man

2006-06-16T21:06:00.000-07:00

Today is Long Man's B'day. Happy B'day Dude Now the world may have heard people to be tall or short but long?? Sounds bit....stange Actually Long Man aka Kiron is 6 feet tall And Chaitu told me he is toooo tall and I thot of naming Kiron and found this word. Long Man No more Kiron Chaleesa Simple Happy B'day to Kiron. May he get hugs and kisses from all his Girl Frends (2 exactly I know, one is _____ and I have spoken with her many times and I have seen the photo of 2nd one.) 3nj0y th3 d4y

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Kumar Chetan!

2006-06-16T20:30:00.000-07:00

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Kumar Chetan!

It is impossible to fold Kumar Chetan more than seven times.
Reindeer like to eat Kumar Chetan!
Kumar Chetan has three eyelids.
Japan provides over thirty percent of the world's Kumar Chetan supply.
The Eskimos have over fifty words for Kumar Chetan!
Kumar Chetan is only six percent water.
Kumar Chetan has often been found swimming miles from shore in the Indian Ocean!
Kumar Chetanomancy is the art of telling the future with Kumar Chetan.
Without its lining of Kumar Chetan, your stomach would digest itself!
Americans discard enough Kumar Chetan to rebuild their entire commercial air fleet every 3 months.

I wanted to blog...

2006-06-15T22:56:00.000-07:00

actually am a free man. free soul. i wanted to blog something. no issue struck me so i thot of just saying this. "hello world"

My hand is ok now

2006-06-15T10:25:00.000-07:00

Like Rahul Mahajan am also saying thanks to every one whos tood by me. But not like Rahul Mahajan this whole stuff is being punched by me only. I dont need any lawyer or legal team to tell me what to say. But I will mention few names here

Keshi, thanks lady
Chaitu, thanks buddy, I know U r there (in Hyderabad) when I need you (in Chandigarh)
Vanathi, thanks a lot. Its my destiny that no female homosapien in reality loves me. Only Wasps love me. I can see 3 nests that wasps have built outside of my room.
Kiron, thanks dyoooode and yes we have same story in Punjabi
Kalyani thanks for ur concern. I can understand ur emotions in ur comment.
Sumit thanks for ur concern too. U need to work hard to be like Ameer and stop copying me and dont be so shameless.
Thanks Dawn ji, darasal main bahut hi dheeth haddi hoon. Jaldi dukhi nahi hota.

BTW like my hand Rahul Mahajan is also fine. He is not "dependent" on drugs and "that day" they just had lunch. I have seen guys geting drunk and then creating scenes but none of them suddenly DIED after drinking. I guess we now have another Manu Sharma. I remember a Punjabi saying which literally means might is always right. So Rahul Mahajan is innocent. May the justice prevail.

The tag stuff

2006-06-14T20:45:00.000-07:00

Vani tagged me. She just knows me as Kumar Chetan and calls me junior baby devil. I will tell you some thing. this lady is out of her mind. I have told her n number of times that am a free soul. am not a devil. but she will say, "OK baby devil". Anyway. The courtsey says thank her and reply to her tag. These Tags things are crap. I asked Vani what to do and she said cook up some story. no am not going to cook up anything. Childhood friend : dont hav any. College friend : Man you rock. ok that was an exaggeration. they say KC your are bit loudmouth and emotional but your are true and honest. And thats true. Hostel friend : My college friends lived with me in hostel. Close friend : My hostel friends are my close friend. My sister : Bhaiyya you are bad but still you are good. confusing. Brother sisters are like that. I will add one more category of friends here NetPals: Your are trustable. The best comment I have got. Thanks pals. You are sweet. W/out even tasting me how can she say I am sweet? I love you by my virtual GF, followed by a kiss and hug on fone and yahoo messenger. Now whome to tag? Keshi and Kiron already tagged Copy Cat stopped blogging. Sumi has disappeared. I think she is trying to find a role in Kyonki Serials. So few people are left. The lady with terrabytes of memory and awesome collection of quotes, great Dawn Fonzters, all of them DiBya Baby Rahul Baby, Who else??? dunno Now I wil b leaving a comment that may force some of these to respond to my tag. lets have some fun.

My Life

2006-06-14T20:21:00.000-07:00

Day = Mondy or Sunday or AnyDay 0700 Hrs: I open my eyes. ok its 7'0 clock. Must leave my bed. 0715 Hrs: Leave bed at last 0716 Hrs: In front of PC. Check Mails and blogs. 0750 Hrs: Must go to toilet, then brush my teeth and shave and if I gathered enuff courage then also take bath 0810 Hrs: In front of PC. Check Mail. 0840 Hrs: To bath or not to bath. Tough question. Lets do some analysis. Weather is hot. So I sweat. I dont like to use deos and perfumes and sprays and... so must take bath. 0900 Hrs: In front of PC. Check Mail. Look for ppl online. 0915 Hrs: Have to take breakfast. 0945 Hrs: In the office. In front of PC. Check Mails. 1315 Hrs: Feel like hungry. hmmm. Not In front of PC. 1330 Hrs: In front of PC. 1930 Hrs: In front of PC. 2030 Hrs: In front of PC. hmm I guess I must think about dinner 2200 Hrs: Done. Dinner Done. Now What? In front of PC. 0100 Hrs: Do I feel sleepy? I guess 0130 Hrs: Sleep. I remember 3 songs and just one line from every song yahi hai meri kahani literaly means this is my story (I have set this as my cell phone's default ring tone) ab to aadat si ho gayi hai means now am used to it zinda hoon main means am alive M sick of my life style and desperately need a break. So I joined French Classes. Je parlé français. But still more or less this is my story. Planning for one week break. May either travel to South or to North.

OUCH!!!!

2006-06-12T10:12:00.000-07:00

A wasp came from no where and kissed my left hand. Its paining now. Ouch!! Cant type anything.

Stats are out

2006-06-08T06:25:00.000-07:00

I hav lot of work to do. But then am a lazy ass and cant move to some other place. So I decided to stay with PC but keep doing somthing thats not related to work. Wat will I do? Wat else? Blogging. But this post is special. First of all I need to say "Dhanyavaadamulu" to all my Telugu pals. Now the real issue. I logged into my Analytics account and studied the stats. Very interesting information. The following stats are for last 7 days. This image can tell about visitors I get on my shameless blog. I am surprised to see visitors from Egypt and Kuwait. AFAIK from Kuwait Jitu may be visiting my blog. Dhanyawaad bhai. But interestingly I also get visitor from Pakistan. No mention here. . The majority share of visitors are Hindustani ppl. I love my India and my fellow Indians.(Actually I love all the beautiful Indian babes). And interestingly major share of my Indian readers is made of Cyberabaadis. Cyberabaad? You dont know Cyberabaad? Hyderabaad yaar. Some of my posts got good number of visitors. I will mention below if you missed them.

Good to see that people read my blog. I have a bad habit of typing too fast and making all kind of grammitcal misstakes. Actually I am not EJUKATED that much. Simple 10+2+Engineering Diploma in Elcetronics & Comm. + Advanced Diploma in Computing. But still I feel proud of my posts. (Shameless you see )

Rahul Mahajan and my niece

2006-06-08T04:18:00.000-07:00

My niece is just 6 yrs old. Barely 6 yrs old. But she is a perfect example of how power plays in our society? Not so long back we used to have powerful "Amrish Puri" kind of "Zamindaars" in our "Hindi" movies. They simply used to do any thing even when the "aam aadmi" of "Gaaon" tried to protest. But the things have changed. Now we have a new setup in which we bend rules for powerful people.

My niece is powerful at home. Why? Youngest one. Only kid in the family. Cute. Sweet. And all those qualities you can expect from a kid. And she enjoys protection and support of every one in the family. Now a simple instance can explain how powerful people bend the rules. My niece and me will play ludo. If I am wining she will bend the rules to win the game or simply to defeat me. I will do a little protest but will let her win.

Rahul Mahajan is Powerful. He is son of Late Mr. Pramod Mahajan. Its not good to say anything bad about Mr. Mahajan now. He is dead. But when I first heard about he being shot by his own bro my reaction was, "WOW, we found a new Vibhishan. We need more Vibhishans." He is in hospital because he drunk too much of champagne or he consumed cocaine. I never heard that too much of drinking can make you this much sick that one of your aide will die and you will be unconscious till morning. Its common sense but the whole setup is trying to prove one simple thing. Rahul even didn't touch cocaine. He even can't spell cocaine. In his statement to police he denied the charges. Appolo hospital is playing yes or no games. Its again commonsense why Rahul was taken to Appolo. You can manipulate private institution using money. Put some middle class guy in the position. The course of action will be

a) Arrest the guy

b) Show him to a magistrate and get detaining orders

c) A court case against him

d) Lot of humiliation

e) At east one year in jail or in lockup.

Now this is not the only classic case. Manu Sharma is another example. I am sure Rahul will be out again after he is discharged from hospital. In fact he will gain public sympathy.

One more thing I noticed yesterday. The attitude of opposition in Indian political system is to oppose government for anything. We all know the hike in fuel prices was evident. If this hike was done by BJP led government the Congress would have started countrywide agitation the same way BJP has started. All they do is to oppose. I guess this is the only reason we call them opposition. Opposition will never help government to find a solution. If they did the government will be winning the votes, which obviously our power hungry opposition will not like.

I just wish that some miracle may happen and our entire corrupt and power hungry politicians are exported to US. Then US will be having its own internal affair to sort out and countries like Iran and Iraq will be safe.

I was expecting this -> http://in.rediff.com/news/2006/jun/08rahul1.htm He is innocent like Manu Sharma.

Me & Nanmun

2006-06-08T02:42:00.000-07:00

Nanmun and me. Playmates. Watching Shrek 1. Fighting over some issue. Basically who will take the chocolate I have baught...

pain ful

2006-06-06T19:42:00.000-07:00

This story is fictional but inspired from a true event. tring tring He: Hey sweetie, hows my love? she: am fine, dear, can we meet 2day? he: is that a question to ask? anytime you say. she: ok wait for me around 10, i will b there he: i can wait for till eternity she: I love you. mmmmuuuuuaaaah. hang up 10:00 at park. He is there. No sign of her. No issues. He will wait. 11:00 - He is still lonely. 1:00 - He calls her and no reply. 3:00 - He is worried about her and have tried all the ways to contact her but all in vain. Next day same story. Imagine yourself in his position. Its painful. But still he loves her. Same is the problem with me. I have typed a looooong post. Let me save it first. Done. And my love FF crashed. FF again dicthed me. Opera is same, same is MS IE. I gues IE is more fast. What to do? If my GF will not turn up on time I will be more worried about her than my ego.

Typical "Phadda"

2006-06-06T03:17:00.000-07:00

Its good I dont know any of these grls. This is typical grl fight. Shot at Lahore. I have seen many fights on vdo and have hard about a lot but I have to see a real one. Thanks Addu. ;-) Ch33r5

Love hurts

2006-06-06T01:04:00.000-07:00

You will be dicthed when you d'ont expect... You will be killed when you need life... You will loose when you will be preparing for the victory... and Firefox will crash when I am near to finish my script. How many times my beloved have ditched me? Just once. It was painfull and I am still feeling the pain. And how many times FF ditched me? n number of times and I can see my self wounded and bleeding now.

Am back

2006-06-05T21:11:00.000-07:00

Be mausami sher arz hai, "sar kata sakte hain lekin sar jhuka sakte nahi" This couplet has nothing to do with my current mood. Bas dil me aya aur keh diya. Another day. another plan to take over this world. Lets get set go...

Typos

2006-06-04T22:30:00.000-07:00

I am $%^#$^#@#$&(%^&#. I type @45 WPM. This means I am all the time doing speeling misstakes. But this is not all. I am also murdering English grammer. I must look for my Wren and Martin. Dad tried his best to teach me English but...

Pandit Kumar Chetan Sharma

2006-06-04T07:02:00.000-07:00

Saturday I was supposed to visit my ancestral village. I have never been to my ancestral place for more than 5 times and that to for few hours. During May end and June starting there are some annual festivals which are celbrated at our ancestral place. One of my cousin raised a question on his identity. Same was with me till few years back. Who I am? Options were

A Brahmin. Jatt Brahmin, farmer or agriculturist brahmins although my great grandfathers, as I have learnt, were in money lending business, the same infamous mahajans or sahukars of hindi movies.
A hindu.
Ludhianvi, 19 years in Ludhiana. People ask me what is the ldh with your ID. This is Ludhiana. I love the city for what it is. Full of three wheelers, full of people from every part of India, full of peopl who dont know what is trafic signal, only cash rich city of north India after Delhi NCR Region.
Hoshiarpuri, 3 wow years in Hoshiarpur.
Punjabi, I love everything that is Punjabi
Madhya Pradeshi, I was born at Vidisha in Madhya Pradesh.
Chandigarhiya, now for last 4 years am in Chandigarh, I like this city just because of its planning.
Himachli,(!!??), when Himachal was not on the map of India our village was in Hoshiarpur and now its in Una. Strangley the Himachal was created on the basis of Language and in and around my ancestral place people speak Punjabi.
Kashimiri(???)Now another theory says ancestors of my ancestors were from Kashmir. Strange.
Aryan, no not the movie Aryan, the aryan who according to some historians invaded India. Some time to call my self a global citizen I call my self Aryan. This basically brings me close to Iran.
Indian, this is the real identity I give to anyone now. I am Indian. Hindustani.

But on Saturday, I was Pandit Kumar Chetan Sharma, a typical brahmin. I performed Puja, applied tilak and lit the jyoti also. But I am an atheist. Why did I perform all this pooja archana? Just to please my GOD. My mom and dad. On saturday I was out of Punjab, out of my Home Network. Airtel sent me an SMS on 1st June. I will give the sms as it is. Dear dubscriber, due to your good payment history we have increased your credit limit to 4500 Rs. This meant I cud make calls upto 4500 Rs w/out even depositing a single pie. ISD/STD/Anything. But unfortunately my roaming service was not actiavted by Airtel. It was like a joke for me. I was in bus and till the time I crossed Punjab I was sending and recieiving SMS, listning radio on my cell. Then I was sleeping. After 3 hours when I wake up I found that I had not recieved any call or SMS. I thot everyone including my clients forgot me. This was a bad thot. Very bad. But suddenly I realised that now I was a free soul. No one wants to talk with me. And I pulled my cell from my pocket and thot of making a call to my mom. And then I realised my roaming was not working. And as soon as I reached my place, every one was shouting at me "What do you think you are..." "Oh so you have become a true IT guy, switch off your cell phone.." "Look at this guy, he is so prody he even switched off his cell..." My mom and dad's face turned from this -> to this -> when they saw me. And my sis just came shouting at me, "Why the hell you have switched off your cell phone? Do you know every one was worried here?"++ After my explainations and when I said I had not taken my breakfast every one turned into a caring person. I performed my puja and all that stuff w/out even raising my eye brows which I usually do. Dad was happy that at last his son was a hindu brahmin close to roots. Mom was happy, sister was excited to see my 1.3MP camera phone. And this was the time I started having headache. "Now you have done your pooja you can take some thing." "I will have tea. Whats your plan now?" "Umm nothing, we all are going to Chinta Purni" "OK. I will have my meals after darshan." "No you can have some thing now." "No no, its ok." And everyone was so much impresssed. Basically I was not interested in having daal and chaawal in heat when I am having headache. But I didnt have any thing even after darshan. That meant nothing till 5 pm. I was feeling that I will die of this headache. I boarded a bus to Chandigarh and by the time I entered in to punjab I wanted som one to come and kill me. My headache was at its peak. I realised my blood pressure was also rising. I could not find any help. I thought of calling mom and dad in my last time. But my cell was still not working. I decided to die a death playing tetris on my cellphone. But am a hard nut to crack and as soon as I entered Nangal my fone started ringing. Dad was online. YEYYYY!!! After finishing my talk with dad I decided to call Airtel customer care and ask them what was wrong. Long man called me and we had a small talk. When around 10:45PM I reached Chandigarh I wanted to kill myself. My headache was at its peak. Soon I got a call from copy cat. After reaching my place I decided to call it a day and straight away after having dinner I went to bed even when my niece bugged me a lot. Rit now, on Sunday 4th May 20:24 Hrs, I am still having headache. But I am again the same Kumar. Pandit Kumar Chetan Sharma is in thots of relatives and cousins.

Title...I dont know

2006-06-02T01:09:00.000-07:00

I again got a blow, Now where to go? Will I give up? My blood group is still AB+ve.

The true professional

2006-06-01T10:17:00.000-07:00

IT field is full of so called "Professionals" who pass out with disticntions and even can't type a simple "Hello World." Girls, I am sorry to say, top this list. 2 of my batchmates had scorec S Grade in C programming module. S Grade means 80+ marks. Me & Shubhu who were trying to hack down a TSR and screensaver using graphics.h just scored D Grade (50-55). But the girls honestly admitted they crammed everything. I appreciate this. And if some one wants to see these kind of pros give an ad for interview. Last year I interviewd a guy. He had refrence of some known person. I always need manpower. But I dont compromise on quality so most of the time I am a harsh guy in interviews even if the candidate is a beautiful girl. The guy claimed he was getting 5K. No issues. I started with very basic. Me: Do u know HTML? He:Ys I gave him a printed form with all kinds of html fields and said Me: Code this form for me. And I need XHTML1.0 Output with labels etc. The guy looked at form for 2 minutes and said, "I only know HTML" Me: So you are getting 5K He:Yes Sir Me: First I will charge 5K from you to teach XHTML, then for 1 month I will not pay you. And after that I will just pay you 1500 Rs. This was enuff for him. It was like you want to hire a driver and the cnadidate even don't know what a steering is. Today again I interviwed a guy. The guy was elder to me. Actually he was my frend's teacher. The age gap is a bad thing and then I really look like a young guy instead of a man running a company. On top of it the guy was more qualified than me. When he met me his first reaction was, "Oh this is Chetan." I had met him with my frend in a wedding. There I was very formal with him. He said to my frend, "I was thinking you are talking about some one else." Then he addressed to me in a very casual manner, "How re you man?" I believe respect comes from heart. I never asked my team mates to call me "Sir", My clear instruction was call me Kumar or Chetan or Kumar Chetan. I knew the interview was not going to be formal. I asked the guy about his past. Me: How much time you think you have put in development? He: I am in to It for last 8 years. Me: Good and you are into coding? He: I am into product development. Me: That sounds good. What kind of products? He: E-governence. Me: Oh really, nice to know, where have you implimented your products He: Till date we have not implimented. We have also developed products for civic bodies Me: Like... He: Water managment, Sewrage Management.. I wanted to ask him how these were different from an e-gov project. Anyway. Me: And you are also into webdevelopment. He: Yes Me: PHP and MySQL? He: Yes ofcourse Me: How many years? He: 6 years Now my total experience in IT field is 6 years. I met a guy of my level Me: Good, can you show me your projects He: mmm the servers are down Me: ?? He: I checked a project it ws online wen I cam to Chandigarh but now I see the server is down. Me: Any other project He: Sorry cant show you, you may approach the client or may reach my team? Me: ??? Why will I approach your client and your team? He: Sorry I need to maintain this. I cant reveal you our projects. Me: Ok, leave it, do you know WordPress and OSCommerce? He: No never heard of these softwares. This was the moment guy failed the interview. My next question was going to be AJAX. But I had to respect him as he was my frend's teacher but I wanted to tell the guy he was taking things lightly and Kumar Chetan is a different person in profession. Me: Bhupinder gave you a site to study. what are your comments? He: Its a simple site. I didnt check the reservation part I dont have credit card to check the site. Me: U dont need to use a credit card. If u simply cant create an account how will you be able to study the site. Anyway I will call you later. Nice meeting you. Later in the afternoon I got a call from the same guy, "Hi Chetan, I cant work with you. You are still working with old technologies. Sorry dude." I laughed. I wanted to F*** the guy on fone but had to respect him as he was my frend's teacher. Some one who is unaware of basics of a system how will he work for me?

What...???

2006-06-01T03:06:00.000-07:00

I am sneezing @ 2.6 sneezes per minute. I need some thing to help me. IDEA. Hot coffee will do. Even Chai will do. I get up from my seat and take my wallet. I must get some milk from market. I go downstair and sit on my bike. Wait a minute. . My bike's keys. OOPS. Forgot. I go upstairs and look for keys. Where are the keys? . I ask copy cat. Me: Have you seen my bike's keys? Copy Cat: Yes, on your table. Me: No they are not here. Copy Cat: Check your pockets then. Me: Nope. Not in pockets. Copy Cat: hmmm Copy Cat is a developer in Hyderabaad and I am in Chandigarh. Where are the keys? I replay the scene in my mind and I found keys in kitchen. I have left my keys in kitchen. I rush to my bike. Wait a minute. Again some thing is missing. Q: What? A: Wallet. Q: Where is wallet? A: Oh I remember I left my wallet on table. I come upstair and pick my wallet. Then make sure I have the keys. Anything else? Nope. Nothing now. OK. I start my bike and her on road. Just 50 meters from my place, I realise I again missed some thing.. Q: What now? A: Helmet. Q: Now what? A: Nothing. Lets face the traffic police now. Nothing bad happened. I didnt see any cops. But as soon as I got back I decided to fix some spots where I will put my keys and locks.

11 players inside the circle

2006-05-31T01:50:00.000-07:00

Count the number of players. 11. And all inside the circle.

The Bayer Rat Of The Week

2006-05-30T22:39:00.000-07:00

Anti Reservation

2006-05-29T23:57:00.000-07:00

The very first time I found I belong to brahmin when I was in que for admission in Govt College Ludhiana. 100 seats and my number was 104th in merit list. Dad said, "Humm, chances are not good." For me it was simply a moment to tell myself, "Dude work hard and improve your handwriting." I got admission in good school. Good Govt. School. My section was B. Again Coz Section A was stuffed of guys with higher merit and some guys from Reserved Category. By now I was aware of guys who were SC and ST in my class. Only one guy look different than all of us. His father was a sweeper in Municipal committee and his cloths used to tell that he was from poor family. Rest of the guys were OK. His name was Hari and he was not good in Maths, English, Physics and Chemistry, all our main subjects. By December 94 it was clear that Hari will not be able to find the momentum of a body. He left the class and joined ITI. Again on a reserved category seat. In 10+2, some of the reserved category guys joined free coaching classes offered to reserved category, SC/ST, students, for pre engineering. Me and some of my batchmates dropped the idea of studying more. There was no good reason. But still we started preparing for entrances. All of the reserved category students performed badly in entrances than other guys. But still some managed to get seats in Govt Engineering Colleges. Some even got seat in Mechanical Engg. As if life had started teaching me, I got admission in a Polutechnic. My batchmates were, again, reserved and general category and one more category, Girls. GIRLS belong to another category which gets special attention. Half of the fee was refunded to girls. My reaction was, "Oh thats kool. Wish I cud have been a reserved category girl." Today after 10 years of all this I again tasted the reservation. I was in a meeting. As the meeting ended I was trying to find a way out of PGIMER. My First reaction to see doctors blocking all the roads wa, "Oh What the hell is this?" I could not find any route that was not blocked. At last some guards suggested me an alternate route that let me out of Chandigarh. I said, "But I want to go to Madhya Marg..." The guard interrupted me, "Babu ji, they have blocked Madhya Marg, take that exit and try to find your route yourself otherwise you will be trapped inside for whole day, they will block this exit also." The doctors in PGIMER Chandigarh are protesting against the reservation on caste basis. Even as I faced problems I support them. I want equal oppertunities for every Indian. There are n numbers of spelling misstakes in this post. The post was punched in hurry and in a rage. So typos are present. 2nd thing like my hand writing my typing speed is too fast and I type w/out even looking at keyboard so all the typos. Like this i have many excuses to tell u that am gr8 and typos are small thing for me. Now what about grammatical misstakes? Hmm need to find more excuses.

sher-o-shayari

2006-05-28T07:59:00.000-07:00

lo ji apni to baat ban gayi, Jagjit Singh ki gazlen mil gayi, Hero Diary bhi mil gayi, ab hum bhi thode shairana ho jayen, sher kisi ka ho aur hum sunaye, mehnat koi kare, aur wah wahi hum le jayen, Idhar aaj chandigarh me ji bhar ke garmi thi, udhar kehte hain ke bangalore me achi baarish hui, baat chali hai mausam ki to ek baat aur keh de, garmi hai bahut to kya, din me do baar naha lete hain, wazan bad raha hai kha kha ke , aur sabun ghis ghis ke ghata lete hain, jagjit singh kehte hain ke, jawan hone lage to hum se kar liya parda, hum kehte hain ke, "Skin tan na ho jaye", is liye unhone kiya hai parda, gaur farmayie is par bhi, ye sona hi hai jo aag met tak kar kundan banta hai, ye garmi hi hai jis me, meetha kharbooza aur aam milta hai bas ji aur nahi hai mere paas kuch kehne ke liye, shukriya bahut muje sahne ke liye, ~ Kumar Chetan copy right left for you. thank you thank you... wah wah bhi khud hi keh loon, wah wah

Me, Myself and My...I forgot wat

2006-05-26T05:55:00.000-07:00

I have a bad habit of forgeting things.

I once lost my sister's hall ticket which dad gave me to get xeroxed.
I lost my all the books
I lost my fav t-shirt
Many time forgot my bike's keys
Forgot helmet many times
Once forgot the examination date and time and reached missed the exam
Still dont know phone number of mom and dad
I forgot pin number of my ATM Card.
Today I lost my ATM Card.

I still dont remeber how many things I have forgot. But then I am still not able to forgot some things that haunt me.

life is full of surprises

2006-05-25T07:38:00.001-07:00

a hot morning, a cool evening, dumped in the morning, loved in the evening, yahan chandigarh me subah ji bhar ke garmi thi, paseene choot rahe the, ab baarish ke aasaar hain, kudrat bhi kamaal ki cheez hai, muje ek sher yaad a giya, Chandigarh ki is be mausam barsaat ki tarah yeh sher bhi bemausam hai, bahut jee chaahta hai ke dosto se haale dil kahiye, magara kya keejiye ab to dost dushwaree se milte hain I have decided to change my style of blogging. I am trying to learn more urdu and also experimented with hindi blogging. Didnt succeed at first. After doing some research and analysis I have decided to change my language to Hindi + English + Punjabi + Bit of Urdu = MyHinglish Ver.01. Why this change? a) More people can understand english. b) Arial, verdana, helvetica fonts are easily available even on handheld devices. c) I dont need to download and install any special software e) jisnu punjabi aandi hai us nu wi eh line samaj a jayegi aur urdu ke jaanne waale ise asaani se samaj jayenge tatha hindi prayog karne walon ko bhi koi kathinayi nahi hogi. Sorry my Telugu and Tamil Pals. U can use read my english scribblings. f) and less gramatical misstakes Ch33r5

Change

2006-05-24T22:40:00.000-07:00

Few years back I was enjoying Jagjeet Singh, then stopped and now again Jagjeet Singh. I used to draw images. Now I dont. I used to have too many friends. No I have few. But life teaches you. Somethings in a simple manner. You have undo options. Some in hard way. U get a scar on ur face. A scar that is present till you die. Chaand ke chehre pe bhi daag hain, us ne bhi zakham khaye hain...

Your Blogging Type Is Thoughtful and Considerate

2006-05-24T00:02:00.000-07:00

Your Blogging Type Is Thoughtful and Considerate

You're a well liked, though underrated, blogger. You have a heart of gold, and are likely to blog for a cause. You're a peaceful blogger - no drama for you! A good listener and friend, you tend to leave thoughtful comments for others.

What's Your Blogging Personality?

One more test for my blogging personality. Crap test but I liked the result.

Do I look like a kid?

2006-05-21T08:48:00.000-07:00

Incident 1, one day in the morning. Me: Hi Copy-Cat: Hi Me: Hey am on webcam, U can see me CC: OK Me: U can see me CC: I said OK Me: Do you want to see me...Plz see me CC: Am working Me: Plz plz plz , you are so sweet, so cute, so good, so charming and so... CC: OK OK, send me the invite I will see Me: YIPPYY!!!! Kumar has send you the invite. CC has accepted to see your cam. Me: CC: hummmm Me: How do I look? CC: ummm Me: Smart, handsome, dashing... CC: You look like a kid to me Me: Incident 2, same day in the afternoon. Phone: Hello Mr. Chetan, Mam will like to see you around 2:30PM Mr. Chetan: Ok I will be there There... Me: Hello Ma'm Ma'm: Hello Me: I am Chetan Ma'm. Oh you are Chetan, we are meeting first time, I thot Mr. Chetan will be some matured guy...anyway lets start our discussion Me: OK Ma'm Incident 3, same day in the evening. She: BUZZ!! Me: Hey She: and for u Me: , I have got cam today She: Really , I want to see you Kumar has send you the invite. She has accepted to see your cam. Me: How do I look? She: Oh look at my baby, Me: Am I a baby??? She: Yes you are a sweet cute little baby, I want to pull your cheeks Me: Incident 4, next day sometime. Me: Yaar, wat do you think my age is? Bhupi: Why? What happened? Are you going to die? Get out of my car and then do whatever you want to do? Me: am not going to die yaar. do I look like a boy or a man Bhupi: Did some girl said some thing to you? did Ur GF said some thing? Me: No yaar, ppl think I look like a Kid Bhupi: You do look like a kid. Me:... I am forced to think about my looks. Do I look like a kid? Need to do something.

Phone Mahima

2006-05-20T04:07:00.000-07:00

Last month I got a new phone. Got. . not a right word. OK. Scrap the line. Last month I purchased a new phone. After doing a lot of research, looking here and there I decided to spend my hard earned money, I work 18+ hours daily, on a rightmodel. Nokia 3230. Nokia 3230 is not a WOW Model. Its simply the cheapest Nokia model that comes with a) Blutooth, I needed b) FM Radio, I desperatly wanted FM Radio in phone c) Shared memory, was looking for it d) Expandable memory, another requirment e) Triband, another major requirement f) EDGE and GPRS, onre more thing I was looking for h) and then more features like IR, camera, MP3 player and this and that and all other stuff. More info at this and this URL. But now I have realised one thing. This phone is slow as compared to my old Nokia 1100. I wanted a phone to be a phone only. The idea of buying a smart phone was to organise my self with Calender and Todo List in Phone. But the phone is slow for me and this is the only problem I have with this phone. Otherwise the same old Nokia qualities are in phone. The phone slipped from my hands 3 times in last 30 days and nothing happened. I was totally wet in rain and my phone was ok. I have clicked many photos with my phone. See here. Then enjoyed the radio on all my trips (just one basically) to Ludhiana. My budget for the cell phone was 5500 INR but this phone cost me aroun 10825 INR. Nearly double what I had planned. I was going to buy Nokia 6610i. The phone had GPRS/FM and camera too. But I was more interested in memory and other connectivities options. 6600 was hot. But I dint want to buy the phone which everyone had. I was looking for Zara Hat Ke fone and I ended up paying 11K. Boy'o'Boy. 11K Ys, am a geek. and I will buy a 300 Rs SK100 Audio Amp Chip but will not buy a 275 Rs Monte Carlo T-Shirt. 275 Rs for a T-Shirt thats expensive. 11K for a phone is cheap. I was eyeing communicator but I know my limits. Mom and dad just said, "Nawa phone?". They didnt ask me the price. Mom and Dad know my tastes. At the end am just happy with the phone. For some one who thinks that a 64 Bit CPU can be more fast the phone is really slow. BTW, like I do with my PC, I dont store anything on my cell. I removed the games and only Tatris and 2 more games are on phone. I created 2 ring tones one wall paper. Wall paper is simple. Right click on the smily and save to your machine and copy to your cell. For ring tones fix an appointment with me. (US$15 + Taxes) per hour. Need to buy one data cable or blue tooth dongle for handset. Will some one lend me some money??

The power of 0 and 1

2006-05-20T00:29:00.000-07:00

A: Hello sir, I am your bank's customer. I want to know something. Bank: Oh sure, how can I help you? A: My a/c no is ..... Some one deposited a cheque four days back and my a/c has not been credited till date. Normally it takes 3 days but today is 4th day. Can you tell me what is the problem? Bank: Certainly, I will be happy to help you, can you just hold for 1 minute, let me punch in the your a/c no into PC and umm... wait and no, there is no sign of any cheque deposit in your a/c. Kindly confirm with the person who deposited the cheque. A: OK hang up... A: Hello sir, how are you? Person: Hi, am fine wat bout you? A: Me not fine, could you please tell me the details of cheque you deposited in my a/c... Person:?? Sure, I deposited a cheque on 16th, cheque no xxxxxx and it was deposited in a/c no 00860011... A: Wait, repeat the a/c no again Person:00860011... A:Oh, now I know Person: what??? A: My account no is 0086000111... Person: Oops!! A: Yes, Ooops!!! I have lost 18K. Moral: Next time note down the Bank A/C no more carefully. Never underestimate the power of 0s and 1s.

Love

2006-05-18T18:49:00.000-07:00

ishq wo aatish hai ghalib, jo lagaye na lage aur bujhaye na bujhe Passion can't be ignited and when ignited can't be put to rest. My dad tried hard, very best, everything, love, slaps, anything, to make sure his son has a good handwriting. But he failed. He could not ignite that passion. I had a flair for sketching but that too died. And now am all determined to learn atleast 2 more languages. Urdu and Persian or French. This time the burning desire has got more fuel from some of good bloggers. Lady DON, I still dont know wats her name Fizaa, Don, Dawn or Seher. But her blogs, this and this, both feature a blog radio, full of gazals, and I am lisning to gazals again. Gazals turn me serious. Now only one person can't make me serious. Then Copy Cat hav suddenly started to like some good songs which are basically gazals. :-( I am tempted to learn Urdu. I have been adding words to my vocabulary. I have become a pain (in b***s) for Adnan and one day he said, dont mail me. But the passion has been ignited. So apart from learning good managerial skills Urdu is on my list now. One sher to conclude. zamane se keh do ab muje na roke, meri rehbari khud junoon kar raha hai Tell the world not to stop me, am being guided by my passion. rehbari = guidence Junoon = passion in this context for me only, the word has got many meanings and depends on the context.

Mojito (Mo-HEE-toh)

2006-05-17T10:21:00.000-07:00

I love Bacardi White RUM. The wallpaper on my desktop is now a glass of Mojito. I simply enjoy Bacardi with water or sometime sparkiling soda but rarely go for cocktails. There is a common belief in India that RUM is only good in winters. But I enjoy Bacardi RUM whole year. How? On the Rocks. Melting ice dilutes the shot and one can sip the rum. I started drinking just coz of taste and now the following is on my list. Mojito recipe - the original authentic recipe from Havana Cuba (Actually I found this from net. Infact I found many and then using law of avearages I only found this one ok. Its easy to find the stuff also.) 1 teaspoon powdered sugar, around 20-25 grams max Juice from 1 lime (2 ounces/50-55 grams/2 tablespoons) 4-5 fresh mint leaves Havana Club white Rum, bacardi wat else (2 ounces/ one drink) 2 ounces club soda (2 ounces/ one drink) i.e. equal amount of lime juice, soda and bacardi with sugar and mint just maikng 25-40% of whole the stuff, for taste only. 1 sprig of mint for garnishing. Place the mint leaves into a long mojito glass (often called a "collins" glass) . Now how to find this glass. Find the tallest glass. The normal Yera glasses found in Indian house hold will not do. Taller glass. Squeeze the juice from a cut lime over it. About two ounces of lime juice. You will need 2-3 limes. Add the powdered sugar, then gently smash the mint into the lime juice and sugar with a muddler (some kind of long wooden thicker than pencil and taller as pencil. Though you can also use the back of a fork or spoon if one isn't available). Add ice cubes if ypu have, (preferably crushed) then add the rum and stir, and top off with the club soda. Garnish with mint sprig. Looks simple.

I am lost

2006-05-16T09:28:00.000-07:00

Back with public demand. Yes people It's me. Praise me. Worship me. I am the one. I am great. Shameless_Self_Promashan ;-)™

Cat Scan

2006-05-14T21:01:00.001-07:00

A lady awoke one morning and discovered her dog was not moving. She called the Vet who asked her to bring the dog in. After a brief examination the Vet pronounced the dog dead. "Are you sure?" the distraught woman asked. The Vet paused for a moment and said, "There is one more thing we can do to make sure". He left the room for a moment and returned carrying a large cage with a cat inside it. The Vet opened the cage door and the cat walked over to the dog, sniffed the dog from head to toe, and then went back to the cage. "Well, that confirms it!" said the Vet,"your dog has got to be dead!" Satisfied that the Vet had done everything he could, the woman sighed, "How much do I owe you?" "That will be $330" the Vet replied. "I don't believe it!" Said the woman, "What did you do that cost $330?????" "Well," said the Vet, "its $30 for the office visit and $300 for the CAT SCAN!!"

Final breakup

2006-05-11T12:07:00.000-07:00

Love is painful. I know love is painful. But still I loved. I have been giving all my time. I closed my eyes to every misstake. I trusted when I was dicthed for first time. I trusted 2nd time. But there is a limit. Its time we part our ways. Its time I say good bye. Its time I realise my misstake. Its time I switch to Mozilla and Dump Firefox. Firefox Sucks. Am again using Mozilla after a time of 3 years.

The Tao Of Programming

2006-05-09T10:57:00.000-07:00

A manager went to the master programmer and showed him the requirements document for a new application. The manager asked the master: ``How long will it take to design this system if I assign five programmers to it?'' ``It will take one year,'' said the master promptly. ``But we need this system immediately or even sooner! How long will it take if I assign ten programmers to it?'' The master programmer frowned. ``In that case, it will take two years.'' ``And what if I assign a hundred programmers to it?'' The master programmer shrugged. ``Then the design will never be completed,'' he said.

Forced to love beer

2006-05-08T09:21:00.000-07:00

Beer in Chandigarh is at its lowest rate. 40Rs for a 650mL bottle. And 1Litre Real Fruit Juice pack costs 65Rs. Drink beer. Atleast 1.5 times. I don't like beer untill unless its CHILD BEAR Typo? Oh yes. Chilled Beer. Some one said... gam ka daur ho ya ho khushi, sama baandhti hai sharaab Moment may be happy or sad, alcohol always soothes. 3nj0y.

Why is FIRE Engine RED in color?

2006-05-05T09:36:00.000-07:00

FIRE Engine has LADDER. LADDER has STEPS. STEPS are to be climed on FOOT. FOOT is measured by a RULER. RULER can be a KING or QUEEN. ELIZABETH is the QUEEN of ENGLAND. ELIZABETH is also the name of a SHIP. SHIP sails on WATER. WATER has FISHES. FISHES have FINS. The people of FINLAND are called FINS. The national FLAG of FINLAND is RED. So FIRE Engine is RED in color.

Lets Stand United

2006-05-01T21:34:00.000-07:00

They have again done it. It just shows their frustation. As soon as I read the news yesterday I wanted to send e-mails full of anger and hate to my fellow Pakistani bloggers. But that is not going not solve the problem. Now I want to ask some questions to some so called humantarians Is killing a 9 year old child in anyway justified? Will killing innocent people get Kashmir Ultras what they say "Azadi" or freedom? Is Jehad killing people? Is killing unarmed helpless people an act of bravery? Where are the Human rights activists who stand with dead bodies Ultras and cry for them? And above all... Where are Pakistani Leaders who support these J&K Ultras? Shame.

To be or not to be

2006-05-01T05:47:00.000-07:00

/* nnother crap post. was lying in draft. am running out of ideas and creativity. need a break. */ I know Shaky cud do this. I know Charlie Chaplin cud do this wen he was old. Even any guy with power can do this. But I can not. Looking at girls. I am powerless. Not Rich. My Dad is not a big gun. Neither do I look like Hrithik Roshan. I am from middle class family and my "Sanskaar" or values dont allow me to look at girls. Girls appreciate when some POWERFULL guy looks at them. Although he may be looking for that thing only but Grls appreciate and crave for those looks. Some one, not powerfull, not rich, not cute and handsome, giving a genuine nice compliment will be considered as flirt, cheap guy. No, I never faced any situation but have seen ppl going thru this. I have been with some "Nice" grls craving for attention from guys having Cars. Guys forget about ur Pulsor. Now even Milkman can afford a Pulsor and Grls are looking for guys who "atleast own a Zen". Time has changed. So have everything. I may b in girl bashisng mood. But all this is true. I wont say all the girls are like this. Some I know are good but majority of gals, Urban or rural, fall for rish brats only. Even when the gals know that the guy will only s**** her still she will do all naaz nakhras infront of these guys. Better sentence. The gals will try everything to seduce these guys. And if a real honest guy approaches them, their attitude is F*** OFF. I read an interview of Imran Hashmi, the serial kisser. He said, "Women like bad men." True. Be bad and shameless and you can win lots of ladies and be good and no lady will look at you. I guess this is simple, rule of the jungle. The one who can dare can do any thing. These bad guys dare to go infront of a girl and propose. The good guy will think, "Man this is not good." And his love will die even before blooming.

Breakup at last

2006-04-30T23:20:00.000-07:00

the word breakup is painful. but then what can I do? I havs some feelings. some emotions. I am not life less. infact my name means life. I tell every one that I have found the perfact things for my life and I will not look at any other but then what do I get backstabbing ditching carelessness and above all data loss i have at last divorced Firefox and Mozilla too. I switched to Opera. Opera is not much better. but its good than both Gecko based browsers. The only good thing that these lizard based browsers have is open source. dr abhishek puri said both are open source whores. I have to agree with him. the time I told him am using opera he send me a hug on Yahoo! messenger. he was trying to convince me for last many months that FF is a piece of SHIT. I knew there were some issues with FF. The website http://www.slyerfox.com/ lists some issues. The very common issue I have faced with FF was loss of personal setting. I lost my bookmarks n nmber of times. and infact I stopped book marking sites. Like a true lover who will quit smoking thinking that smoking is more injurious to health than girl friend and its better he risk the less. but the real pain was FF crashing w/out any notice and me suffering data losses. I can suffer hardware problems but data loss is something like heart attack. I can imagine a happy life w/out doing NSTP but I cant imagine a second with data loss. I tried using Mozilla for a while but Mozilla is same. I lost my bookmarks again. the other issue that didnt bother me much was that FF is resource hungry. so what I guess all GFs are reosurce hungry. they all need time and gifts and more time and more gifts. I didnt want to use IE as IE is just like Aishwarya Rai. Beauty w/out brain. I guess my fantasies are over now. Opera is also crashing like any thing but I dont loose my bookmarks. and as soon as opera crashses and I relaunch it will ask me if I need the pages I had opened. nice feature. Bottom line. No browser is good on MS Windows. Back to work.

Salami salam

2006-04-30T02:01:00.000-07:00

I got this stuff from this website.

Salami Salam

Written by: Hamzah Moin

Saying salams to the opposite gender on campus is actually quite the trivial issue. Some scholars say that men should be required to initiate the salams to the sister while other scholars say it should be sister that should start off with the salams.

The following scenario looks at a common incident through different points of view and what exactly is going on inside the minds of a sister and a brother (in Islam).

Sister's Point of View:

**sister walks out of exam hall**

Oh my gyad, that chemistry test was so easy! I'm sooooo happy for finishing my last exam. This is the happiest day of my life! LOL!

**a brother exits from opposite exam hall**

Oh, WHO is that? Is he Muslim? He has an ugly beard ewww. He looks scary. And WHY is he walking this way? Oh my God he's headed straight towards me! Okay, be calm… it's all normal. Just be polite and make eye contact and…

BROTHER: Assalamu Alaikum SISTER: Walaikum Musalam

OH MY GOD. He just said salams to me! No way it must have been to someone else. Wait, but there is no one else around. OH MY GOD IT WAS FOR ME. But why? Why would a random brother just say salams to me? It just doesn't make sense. I've been wearing this hijab for ages… so why the salams NOW?

Hmmm, this brother looks like he's almost done in under grad. Isn't that the brother who got into med school? Wow he's so smart mashAllah. Why would someone like that say SALAM to me? Was he just trying to be nice? Hmmm.

OR maybe he was being MORE than nice. Yeah I think that has to be it. OMG no way. Does he like me??? I've never seen him before but I sometimes study in the science library so he probably saw me. Why wouldn't he say salams to me then? Maybe he was waiting to become more secure in his field before saying salams to me? I think that must be it. He is no doubt scouting people… of course.

This is soooo weird lol. But mashAllah he's a good looking brother. I'm sure he's pious. That beard looks good on him mashAllah. I wonder if he's talked to his parents about me yet? I hope his parents will like me. I'm a nice girl though. All the aunties love my personality lol.

But if he lives far away then I might have to move close to his parents' house because his job will probably be around there. Oh man the change in life will be sooooo hard to get used to. I wonder if he's going to live in his own place or if we're going to move in with his parents? I wouldn't mind living with his parents ONLY if they're open-minded. Uffff I hate close-minded people. I want to have nice in-laws.

I hope he wants a simple Nikkah. I can't stand all that extravagant crap that goes on nowadays. He seems very simple and down-to-earth though mashAllah. Definitely my kind of man. I wonder how he is with kids. I don't mind having kids but he better not be the type that wants like 50 kids. OMG that would so suck. 3 is a good number. I like the names Bilal , Mariam and Ayesha. InshAllah it'll be in that order.

I wonder if he's very science-y. I don't like when people are too science-y. I think our kids should do anything they want as long as they are successful. Bilal would make a good social worker I think.

He seems like the type that would always compliment my cooking, no matter how bad it is lol J I hate guys who think women belong in the kitchen. I think he'll help out once in awhile too. He seems so gentle and delicate hahah.

Wow I hope when Bilal grows up he'll let me and that brother live with him. I don't want to go to any retirement home! No inshAllah that brother will instil good values into Bilal. But OMG should I wait until he says salams again? I'm sure he'll make the first move.

Brother's Point of View.

**brother walks out of exam hall**

Wow. I think I failed that exam. I haven't shaven for days because of these stupid exams. I look like a werewolf. Stupid science. I think I'll switch into political science next year… I can't take this. Hey is that a hijabi over there? Hmmm I think I should be polite and say salams.

BROTHER: Assalamu Alaikum SISTER: Walaikum Musalam

Man, I'm hungry. I wonder what's for dinner tonight? Hopefully spaghetti.

Hello Sir...

2006-04-27T22:31:00.000-07:00

Un Solicited calls. Normal. Very normal. I get these kind of calls. Tring Tring... Me: Hello Other side: Hello Sir, this is Shikha Me: Who? She: Shikha Now at this moment I feel she will say, I love you, are you free this weekend, can we go for a date? Me: Yes () She: Sir, I am calling from Hutch wali company. Me: What ? Now I know wat is she going to say Me: Hey Shikha, delete my name from your database and plz dont bother me again. and I will hangup. This was unsolicited. But today one Airtel guy called me on my landline He: Hello Sir, this is Vikram, am calling from Airtel broadband. I am doing a survey. Me: OK, What do you want from me? Some fake data or what? He: (Smiles like this -> ) No Sir, will ask you some questions... Me:(interupting) No thanks I dont need any STD/ISD/Local calling/Hello Tunes Pack He: No Sir, I just want to know are you satisfied with our services? Me: mmmmm, I guess you are not too bad. I mean Airtel is OK. Am satisfied. Atleast you ppl have a customer care who seldom used your services and claim they know everything. I can call Ur customer care and argue with them and satisfy my ego. He: OK Sir, what more you want from our side. I will note it down. Me: Give me Unlimited free calling to any number on this planet. Give true 128 KBPs Speed on ur 128 Pack. Dont send me invoice and ask me any money for your services. Did you note all these? He: Yes sir. Me: Read wat all I said to you. He: Ok sir, you want free outgoing, dont want to pay for any services and If I am not wron you want 256 from your 128 Pack. Me: Excellent!!! He: thanks sir . Nice talking to you. Me: Same here buddy. Have a good day

Reservations

2006-04-26T21:31:00.000-07:00

ET has opened a debate on "Is Premji right to go against job quotas in Wipro?" As expected most of the posts agree with him... here is someone who put his pt in a v diff way... -------------------------------------------------------- I think we should have job reservations in all the fields. I completely support the PM and all the politicians for promoting this. Let's start the reservation with our cricket team. We should have 10 percent reservation for muslims. 30 percent for OBC, SC/ST like that. Cricket rules should be modified accordingly. The boundary circle should be reduced for an SC/ST player. The four hit by an OBC player should be considered as a six and a six hit by a OBC player should be counted as 8 runs. An OBC player scoring 60 runs should be declared as a century. We should influence ICC and make rules so that the pace bowlers like Shoaib Akhtar should not bowl fast balls to our OBC player. Bowlers should bowl maximum speed of 80 kilometer per hour to an OBC player. Any delivery above this speed should be made illegal. Also we should have reservation in Olympics. In the 100 meters race, an OBC player should be given a gold medal if he runs 80 meters. There can be reservation in Government jobs also. Let's recruit SC/ST and OBC pilots for aircrafts which are carrying the ministers and politicians (that can really help the country.. ) Ensure that only SC/ST and OBC doctors do the operations for the ministers and other politicians. (Another way of saving the country..) Let's be creative and think of ways and means to guide INDIA forward... Let's show the world that INDIA is a GREAT country. Let's be proud of being an INDIAN.. May the good breed of politicans like ARJUN SINGH long live... I completely agree with this guy.

Cheer Up Man

2006-04-26T08:54:00.000-07:00

Ok Life is some time very hard. 2 hard. 3 hard. 4 hard and so on but then am also shameless. I myself is a problem for problems. need to deliver some thing by 9:30PM and my clock is showing 9:32 PM. pretty keeewwwwlll. eh. Thats wat I call life.

Coldplay: Fix You

2006-04-26T03:54:00.000-07:00

"When u try your best but you don't succeed, when you get what you want but not what you need, when you feel so tired but you cannot sleep, stuck in reverse, lights will guide you home"

na jane kyon

2006-04-25T11:50:00.000-07:00

reh reh ke ruk ruk ke na jane kyon main fir chalta hun main fir nikalta hun kya manzil ki talaash? ya kuch paane ki aas hai? ya koi anbujhi pyas hai? ya fir kuch aur khaas hai? na jane kyon main chalta hun, thakta hun, rukta hun, saans leta hun, aur fir kadam badhaata hun, manzil ki talash nah kuch khaas nahi koi pyas bhi nahi na jane kyon main chalta hun kal fir se aaj hua aaj fir se kal hua do din beet gaye ik pal nahi jiya chal raha hoon thak raha hoon hummm, man I cant write a poem. shame. send some +ve remarks.

What do we need?

2006-04-21T22:21:00.000-07:00

Edit: this was lying in drafts for i think 15-20 days. Still not complete. I almost forgot wat I wanted to say. the fontzer management is responsible for all this crap :P. Publishing at last. There has been so much hue and cry over reservations. This is not the only issue Indians are coping up. But this is an issue which clearly tells what our leadership is upto. No one is bothered about the real problem India is facing. Our BSP leaders, Mayawati and all that, will b happy for reservations. They need reservation to wipe out the Manuwadis and uplift the Dalits. To some extent I support reservations. But in todays India who is actually a dalit? Dalit verbally means oppressed. Jessica Lal. She was murdered openly and the killer is out, roaming freely. I guess her family is dalit. The parents of the martyr soldiers, who are struggling hard to get old age pensions. The rickshaw puller brahmin who is not able to earn 2 times meal is I guess a dalit. The labour that works in steel mills in Ludhiana and die in explosions and their kins get just 30000 Rupees as compensation, the family is dalit. A student works hard with all the meager resources and then finds that his seat is taken by some guy who got free coaching and scored less then him but got the seat as he was SC/ST/OBC is a real dalit. Reservations are nothing but a poll prank. Congress just wants to win elections. Congress and even BSP is not bothered about the real dalit. What BSP did when it was in power in UP? They encroached lands and did just built parks. Lemme think. I need breakfast. Can a Ambedkar park help me? According to my knowledge and understanding only food stuff will help me. BJP was also in power and it promised the hindus that as soon as they get power they will build Ram Mandir. Where is Ram Mandir? Infact the whole India heard that Mr. LK Advani thinks Jinnah was right. In my opinion one who demands partition just on the basis of caste and creed and the other who supports it in any way is totally insane. I will not divide my home if one of my family starts worshipping Shiv ji and other one Ma Vaishno. Communist like every other aging thing needs to revive them. I understand that our fellow countrymen needs equal opportunities. So that doesn't mean I will feed some one who is just busy organising Bandh or strikes. ...un finished.

Woodey Allen

2006-04-21T21:02:00.000-07:00

Management Vs IT

2006-04-21T05:57:00.000-07:00

A man piloting a hot air balloon discovers he has wandered off course and is hopelessly lost. He descends to a lower altitude and locates a man down on the ground. He lowers the balloon further and shouts "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?" The man below says: "Yes, you're in a hot air balloon, about 30 feet above this field." "You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist. "Yes I do," replies the man. "And how did you know that?" "Well," says the balloonist, "what you told me is technically correct, but of no use to anyone." The man below says, "You must work in management." "I do," replies the balloonist, "how did you know?" "Well," says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you're going, but you expect my immediate help. You're in the same position you were before we met, but now it's my fault!"

Health is wealth

2006-04-21T00:06:00.000-07:00

So after taking so many long braks am back. Back to do more shameless self promotions. I even got a domain booked and planned to move my blog there. But then I dropped the idea of having one more blog. Instead of starting too many projects its better to concentrate on one project. Currently I am working on 2 blogs. My own Shameless and the second Bewajah. My experienc with bewajah has been encouraging for me. My experiment was success ful and am really happy for that. More over I got a team for bewajah and all its good to see that Chaitu is really working well. Thanks Chaitu. In between all these breaks I suffered from stress. One fine day, I wake up and experience some headache. As am a lazy ass and more afraid of doctors than deseases I popped up a disprin. 2nd day the same thing happened. and on 3rd day I was on bed. tried to sleep. cud not. I wished the roof comes crashing on my head but then I am living in a rented accomodation so causing damage to landlord's property was not a good idea. some how I tried to get some rest. didnt work for 18 hours that day and just reduced wrking hours to 8-10. but my body is not used to rest and sudden sleep in day time caused back pain. OUCH!!! Back pain. for 4 days. I again wanted to die but could not. Then there was a cyst in my right eye. for long, atleast for 10-11 months I have been avoiding it. But at last one of my client said, "Chetan 2mro u come and see me, I know one eye surgeon and we will get this cyst removed. a small surgery" Surgery. AYYO!!! (I have learned this new slang from my Tamil frends.) The surgery took just 15 minutes. Doctor said, "Dont worry you will feel the pain of injection only." I said, "I can bear pain but am afraid of doctors only." Doctor had a hearty laugh and I just smiled. My Big Seductive/Mystic/Full of Love/and all the best on this planet eyes are on now. This is not all. Working 18 hours a day means you loose energy every day. In the starting of March I felt all my trousers are becoming tight. My waist has gone from 29 to 30 and now it was crossing 30 and touching 31. At a time when all my financial planning was aimed at saving money, I was not ready to buy new trousers. In the starting of April, I was back to normal, waist 30 inches. Good. Little bit of fasting and dieting on fruits and juices helped me. Now my health is ok. No back pain. No headache. No stress. No problem with my wow eyes. Waistline OK. Time to take over the galaxy now.

Back due to public demand

2006-04-20T09:41:00.000-07:00

AP:There has been wide speculation in blogospehere about the sudden vanishing act of Kumar Chetan. Lots of people have inquired our office and lots of other investigation have been on. People who knew this GREAT personality tried to contact him asked what was the reason that he stopped blogging. One of our journo tried to approach and asked Kumar Chetan why he was offline. He disclosed that from coming next week he will be again back to blogging word. Following is an interview our correspondent had with Kumar Chetan Journo: Hello sir, Kumar Chetan: YO!! J: Parden me sir, i cud not get your "YO!!" KC: You will never get. Gr8 men just say. they don't explain. only the followers interepret and write books on gr8 men. J: dont you think you are too shameless. I am bound by my job otherwise I wud have better wathced a mallika sherwawt movie instead of interviewing you. KC: no dear, you are just jealous of me J: watever, you have been offline. thank god. why so? KC: Tell your GOD, i will b back soon. actually i have been very busy with some sudden assignments that came in my personal and professional life. J: was u busy acquiring google or microsoft KC: Google and MS are not my target. I dont concentrate on these smaller companies. My target is to acquire Pehalwaan da dhaaba in Sector 15 in Chandigarh. J(interupting): I know. you will now start telling me about your so called Culinary skills. Leave it. What was your personal problem? Did Aishwarya Rai approached to you for patch up? I have heard that you broke up with her 2 years back. KC: No, Aishwarya is now a just good friend of mine. Gone is the time I was in love with her. I mean I still love her but I wont marry with her now. Lets not discuss Aishwarya Rai. Actually I have been sick. Lots of pains like Bak pain, Neck Pain, Headache and Stress J: Oh, so u get stress. I thot u came on this planet to give stress to other people KC: You are jealous of me J: watever, now wats your plan? do u plan to return to blogging word? KC: Who said I was out of blogging? I have been active on Bewajah. My own space at this blog was not being updated regularly. I will be doing that soon. I have got lot of issues. I have a new cell phone and I need to put my review on it. Then I watched some mvies , like Yahaan and I need to write about them. Then I passed thru some awkward situtaions. I have just found that one of my fan have started spreading rumours that she is my GF. I need to work on my Public Relations also. J: Do you mean to say you will be back in blogosphere? Oh dont say that. KC: Hey baby I was never out. I told U... J(interupting): bbye. I cant bear you. You are shameless. KC: So wat do u expect from me. Look at the title of my blog.

Shameless_Self_Promashan ;-)™

Our correspondent is suffering from stress now and has been hospitalised. * AP: Not associated press its Apni Press

Ayi Baisakhi

2006-04-13T00:31:00.000-07:00

Mukk gayi kankan di raakhi, Jatta ayi baisakhi, M not able to recall the original poem by Dhani Ram Chatrik but all I remmber that is today is Baisakhi. Baisakhi diyan sab nu wadhai. Mainnu sharam a rahi hai ke main bhull kiwen giya. Wikipedia te Baisakhi te ik lekh hai. URL eh riha -> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baisakhi

A picture says more than words.

2006-04-09T00:44:00.000-07:00

I virtually live with Yahoo! Messenger. Following is a piece of converstaion between me and my virtual GF. BUZZ!! (by her) Me: She: Me: She: Me: She: Me: She: Me: She: u r alwayz bz Me: No am not. talk to me She: Me: She: Me: She: Me: She: enuff crying. stop this. Me: She: I said stop this. Me: She: Me: She: Me: She: happy now Me: yes She:r u bz Me: ys She: You dont have time for me. for last one month you are not talking with me Me: dear am overwrked. dont get angry. She: wat can i say do ur wrk bbye Me: She: smile baby, i want u to grow. give me a hug I will come back in evening Me: And she will sign out... Pictures say more than words...

Linux a BIG hit in India

2006-04-08T22:25:00.000-07:00

And so at last the beast fell and the unbelievers rejoiced. But all was not lost, for from the ash rose a great bird. The bird gazed down upon the unbelievers and cast fire and thunder upon them. For the beast had been reborn with its strength renewed, and the followers of Mammon cowered in horror.

from The Book of Mozilla, 7:15

PS: I am busy :(. I will quote Arnie, "I will be back."

Coming out of beta

2006-04-02T20:41:00.000-07:00

When will you take Google Gulp out of beta?

Man, if you pressure us, you just drive us away. We'll commit when we're ready, okay? Besides, what's so great about taking things out of beta? It ruins all the romance, the challenge, the possibilities, the right to explore. Carpe diem, ya know? Maybe we're jaded, but we've seen all these other companies leap headlong into 1.0, thinking their product is exactly what they've been dreaming of all their lives, that everything is perfect and hunky-dory – and the next thing you know some vanilla copycat release from Redmond is kicking their butt, the Board is holding emergency meetings and the CEO is on CNBC blathering sweatily about "a new direction" and "getting back to basics." No thanks, man. We like our freedom.

What is love?

2006-04-02T07:11:00.000-07:00

I am fasting so that my mom don't need to fast. My mom is fasting so that I don't need to fast.

Outsourcing: Demand of the present time

2006-04-02T01:13:00.000-08:00

Outsource is very infamous word. Half of US outsources their jobs to India and still cries against outsourcing. I read on some website that in US, T-shirts bearing "We hate Chinese stuff." were sold and these Ts were outsourced from China. Now how true this can be is another matter. But Outsourcing is making an impact on Indian economy. I am surprised to see the teenagers or 20 somethings making money. In my city there are many call centers and many more are coming up. One of my friend had once planned to open an international call center but some how the idea didnt work out. They even hired a consultant butat the end they decided to concentrate on domestic setup only. So wats the big deal in outasourcing? Is it against any country? Specially against US? Lets find it by an example. I have lot of cloths that are calling for immidiate washing. As I am a lonely guy the only one who can take care of the mess is me. So the only resurce that can be utilised to wash cloths is me. But I a) am lazy b) Dont have enough time c) Don't have proper equipments, mainly tubs, buckets and or washing machine. Just moved to new place. So I have decided to outsource this job. Dhobi has agreed to wash and then iron my cloths@6Re per cloth. Good. Outsourcing this job to a dhobi will help me in saving a) my invest ment on euipments. b) Time, the most valuabale thing c) Extra money which I will give dhobi to iron my Cotton trousers even if I wash them myself. Ironing is an issue. I can iron my cloths myself but the Ironing done by Dhobi is high quality. Now If I compare the costs with resources that I have, outsourcing makes sense to me. As it happens anywhere, as soon as the news broke out to the world that I am going to outsource this job many Indians have approached me with WOW plans. But I have decided to rely on dhobi nearest to me as he is a) easily approachable b) giving a good deal c) can b scolded if he delivered bad "Quality" Moreover his turnaround time is very low. 3 days. And he is offering pick and drop service at no extra cost. What else I need? PS: some one still suggested I must get married. Not because my wife will wash my cloths becaouse she will force me to buy a washing machine. m very busy

All lines to this route are busy...

2006-03-31T10:53:00.000-08:00

All lines to this route are busy...kindly try aftr some time. OK a joke also. Yamraj killed a guy before his actual time. Chitragupt, his PA, asked, "Sir, this guy was supposed to live for one more year. Why did you end his life early?" Yamraj, "Man 31st march is approaching. We have to do closing. I have to reach my target also..."

Happy B'day to Patil

2006-03-26T06:07:00.000-08:00

Bole to aaj apun ke ek net pal ka B'day hai. Happy B'day Mangesh... I will keep bugging you as usual. May this year u get ur _ May this year u clear all ur exams and break all the world records May this year U upgrade UR PC May this year I learn some marathi from you May you find all the things you wish... Happy B'day

Close encounter of the third kind

2006-03-23T08:58:00.000-08:00

"Hello Sir..." "Oh hi, how are you?", the person on other side didnt let me intoduce myself. I am a big star. No moron. This is called caller identification service. You call some one cell phone and your number is displayed. Sad. The appointment is fixed with Mr. D. Time 12:30. Around 12:25 I am inront of Mr. D's office. His office is locked. Anyway I can wait for 5 minutes. Lets walk in the gallery. 10 steps forward and 10 steps back. This will help me in loosing weight. I am gaining weight. OK lets start loosing wieght. One step. Two setp. Three step. When the hell time will turn 12:26 to 12:30. Anyway, the time can not stop. It may increase the speed of time when your enjoying and when you are waiting for some one it may halt. 12:26:30 12:26:31 12:26:32 Some time watching a digital clock can be very entertaining. It can be such a fun if you are in a gallery where you are the only one. No one else but you. But all good things come to an end. Its 12:27:45. What now? Look at name plates. Read all the name pates. With a reading speed more than my typing speed this was just 2 minutes job. Hurray!!! 12:30 IST. But I was misstaken. IST stands for Indian Stretchable time. And doing same 10 step walk I spend another 5 minutes cursing all the Indians who dont care for time. But then suddenly time changed. No no, not to 12:36 but to happy times. I see a lady entering the gallery. Beautiful. Young. Height, one inch less than mine. Hairstyle...umm till date I am not able to classify hairstyle but it was a good hairstyle. Yellow Punjabi suite. She looks wow. She is coming toward me. YES, toward me. Time has changed. How to impress a lady? The one who finds the answer will get all the Nobels, as this skill is both a science and art. Persons like me who can just hit keyboard know nothing. So better pretend you never saw her and I keep my 10 step walk program continue. She passed me. I had scanned her but pretended that I never saw her. I was at the end of th gallery hence I was sure she can not ago anywhere but wait like me as all the cabins were locked. HIP HIP HURRAY!! And the same happend. I turned back and saw her standing infront of a cabin. There she was standing. Pretty Lady. Do I need to sing Pretty Lady to impress her? Then suddenly I realised she looked at me. I gave a careless look. I am not looking at you lady. I am not like those morons who are always looking at women. And after finishing my 10 step I again turn back. I fooled her. I did see her. She has got a cellphone. Nokia 2200. Good. I will ask her to shift to Airtel, then I will subscribe to soem unlimited calling plan and will talk with her. What else I can do? Thinking this I finish my 1oth step and turn back and see her standing midway of my 10 step walk route. Look am a magnet. This woman has been attracted by my persona. She is impressed by me. I can surely ask her for a date. But still I pretend I don't care and take 3 steps and turn back. Let her break the ice. Why always a man? Let her talk to me. If I will get a date she will also get a date with a great man like me. Now my greatness has not been recognised by this world is an another issue. Why do women want men to beg on their knees? Why? Mystery. In my life I am sure at a point of time I will be able to solve any mathematical equation, but I will not still be able to tell what a woman is. This time I took more time to finish my remaining 3 steps. And when I turn back she is not there. She has again gone to that cabin. 15 steps away from me. Sad. What if I keep walking and she is not able to start a conversation and we both miss the date? No no. Let me initiate. And the lady is looking at me. LOOKING AT ME. ...and smiling. Killer smile. No its confusing. Is she really looking at me or looking at my side. I again pretend I never saw her smile. I keep reactions inside my brain and take my steps. And as soon as I am reaching my 7th step the lady starts walking towards me. This is it. She wants to talk with me. I will impress her. Will take her to Sukhna Lake. The most appropriate place for some one like me. No shops. No expensive cafe. No expensive restraunt. Total expense not more than 100 bucks including the fuel expenses. And above all I like sukhna lake. She looks pretty in suite but she will look same good in any dress. In all these thoughts I didn't notice I was just 2 steps away from her and she was really smiling. I think its time to stop pretending. Not good. Its not courtsey. Must reply a smile by a smile. This beahviour of mine will not get me any date. And as soon as I decide to spread a smile I hear voice from back side. "Hello Mrs. Khanna, sorry I am late." And Mrs. Khanna. Yes, she is Mrs, not Miss. She is talking with a doctor and they both walk out of gallery. Close encounter of the third kind. Good, I kept my thoughts within myself. PS: This was in draft mode for long and at last its out. Simply a fiction and again inspired by a fact. I was waiting for some one and saw one smart lady. Rest all is spicy as usual. As usual lot of grammatical errors and typos are present. Not satisfied. Actually I dont want to write good stuff. I dont want to win Nobel prize every year.

We, the Indians

2006-03-22T09:19:00.000-08:00

One of my collegue asked me. Infact he was confirming. "23rd is holiday." I looked at him with a question mark on my face. "Why" "23rd is a Governmentt Holiday." "So...?" My reactions confirmed that there was no chance of holiday. "No, I was just telling." "Do you know why 23rd is a govt holiday?" "No, actually my dad told me that 23rd is his holiday..." The guy had no answer. But I have. 23rd is a black day in Indian history. We lost Bhagat Singh. For my friends less informed, the Bhagat Singh is same guy whome Mr. MK Gandhi could have saved. Who could have changed the face of India. The guy suffered same fate as other opposer of MK Gandhi suffered. Nodbody remembers them. Very few care about Bhagat Singh and those who care just came to know about Bhagat Singh after watching Ajay Devgun as Bhagat Singh or more recently after watching Rang De Basanti. There is one problem with Indians. We don't value our heros. We need a holiday associated with their death or birthday. If no holiday we dont remeber them. I hav been very much inspired by Bhagat Singh and his philospohy. My athiesm is due to some of his thoughts. 23rd is not the day of just remebering and reading the biography of Bhagat Singh but its the day to sit back and think what have we done to the country for which Bhagat Singh gave his life. Although I can not compare myself with Bhagat Singh but I am serving my motherland. I am not littering my city. Paying taxes, even when I know the tax I pay will be used to buy laptops for our politicians who don't know what a laptop is. I prefer buying Indian products. Above all, even after offer for free immgration consultation, I still dont want to apply for any work visa. Putting India's point and telling people that Indians are not cheap labor. They cost less and give quality work. This is an incomplete post... Why?

Eat-i-quettes

2006-03-21T19:11:00.000-08:00

You order a plate of fried rice and the waiter give u fork and knife, along with spoon. Now spoon is ok. But knife and fork??? I am a convert. There was a time I was crazy about Chinese. Then Pizza. But at the end am again back to North Indian stuff. Same dal roti and Tanduri stuff. I wont order any other dish in restaurants as I know I will never find authentic stuff. Chinese noodles are normally boiled and fried noodles. Just with added dash of Soya sauce. Then dumplings, more commonly known as momos, they suck. Crap. Then come to dosas. Order any dosa. No change. Same story is with Uthapam. And sambar. All south Indian food joints serve sambhar as it is some kind of substitute for water. No offend to any Mallu, Telugu or Tamil frend but am really amazed to see sambhar with everything. I still don’t know is sambhar taken separately or is it eaten along with the main item, say uthapam or dosa. The story is far worse with Punjabi stuff. The Dal is same. Order any kind of stuff that comes with gravy, gravy is same. Still I see lot of rush in Sector 35 in Chandigarh. I have sampled many eating joints and I am still searching for a joint that serves authentic regional food. I have learned a super duper hit formula for cooking any thing that needs gravy. Its bit painstaking job but the result is really delicious. So let’s get set and go. Ingredients for this wonderful gravy Onions, finely sliced onions. Don’t use mixer. Slice them. Finely. 4-5 cloves. Laung. 3-4 an inch-long Cinnamon sticks. Dalchini. Cumin seeds. Jeera. Half spoon will do. Salt according to taste. Turmeric Powder. Haldi. Green Chillies. Finely sliced. Hari Mirch. ;) Tomatoes. Again Finely sliced. Tamatar Ginger and Garlic too. Adrak and Lehsun. Black Pepper seeds. Kali mirch. Cardamom pods. Adi Ilaichi. Coriander. Half spoon. Sukha Dhania Red chilli flakes. Lal Mirch. Curry leaves. Tej pattar. I don't like using powdered spices. Spices loose their aroma while grinding. So to fill the kitchen with aroma I prefer using whole spices instead of grinded or powdered. Oil. Now this is an issue. Mustard oil tastes good and is good for health also. But normally it’s hard to find good stuff. Nearly all the stuff is refined and the oil looses the aroma. Heat sufficient oil in pan that can cover the onions you have. Fry onions in this oil till they turn golden brown. All this is to be done on mild flame. Mild flame and think base of cooking pan do wonders. Now, when the onions are brown enough add cumin seeds, cloves and cinnamon sticks. Keep frying. This is the toughest part and this decides what will be the result. Add green chilies now. Keep stirring the paste in pan. Otherwise paste will stick to pan and you will end up cooking charcoal. Keep adding a spoon of water. This will prevent the paste from sticking to base of pan. What about ginger and garlic paste? Add this too. One after another keep adding the spices and add turmeric at the end. Now keep moving a spoon in pan after regular interval so that paste is not sticking to pan. This is the climax. Add sliced tomatoes. In fact tomatoes are optional. But if you add tomatoes you need to keep stirring so that the tomatoes juice is properly mixed up with the paste. Keep stirring occasionally. After 5-10 minutes of cooking a very aromatic paste will be ready.

UMMMMMM!!!

Now this is the base for

a) Chicken/Paneer dishes. Add marinated chicken/Paneer to this paste add some water and keep stirring. Cook for 15 minutes in this paste. Masala Chicken/Paneer ready.

b) Dum aloo. This is not the right way to cook dum aloo. Add marinated potatoes in the paste. Fry for a while. Add skimmed curd and cook for a while.

c) Rajmah/Kale Channe Use pressure cooker to make the paste. Add Rajmah/Kaale Channe to this paste. Add enough water. Wait for 4-5 whistles. Rajmah/Kaale Channe must be soaked for at least 12 hours.

d) Mutton Use pressure cooker to make the paste. Add marinated mutton to this paste. Add sufficient water. Wait for 2-3 whistles. Not a proper way to cook mutton but works for me.

To make things tastier cook jeera rice along with any of this dish. Jeera rice is so simple to cook. We need soaked rice. A spoon of Jeera or cumin seeds. One tablespoon oil. Not mustard oil. Heat oil in pan. Add cumin seeds. As soon as you see the seeds turning into black add soaked rice to pan. Mix the rice and cumin seeds properly. Cook as you simply cook he rice. Simple dish but the aroma is wow.

Enough of cooking. I must go and have my dinner.

Pride and prejudice

2006-03-20T09:33:00.000-08:00

I am unique like every one else. I can make my presence felt immediately. I have a unique face. The very first look makes sure that no one forgets me. And if a conversation is started the other side will end up worshipping me.

OK, I agree that last line is exaggeration. But still I can convince every one that I am really unique and no on like me exist in this galaxy. (Where are you all the beautiful girls? Am still single.)

Many people said, man you are full of energy and confidence. But I have been over confident too.

During first year of my diploma, my teachers were able to notice me. I was leading group experiments. Our English teacher decided to change the way were studying. He wanted to improve our personality.

So one good day when we were rushing to our class rooms.

Me: Crap. This guy, (our teacher) is full of crap.

My pals Bhupi and Devinder were not interested in my thoughts and didn’t even notice what I was saying. The dames of our class were also coming out of girl’s hostel. Now it is normal for guys to forget everything and drool over beautiful girls.

One girl: Hi KC. Me: Hi, how are you.

The girl was one of the studious book worm kind of, what do you call those people who know nothing except course books.

The girl: You know sir has asked me to prepare a lecture. I don’t know what to do. Me: You know this guy is crap. The girl: No, he is not WOW. I found some one who is listening to me. Bug her. Me: Amita, you are mistaken. Do you know all he is doing is out of syllabus? He is just forcing us to sit in class room. Amit: No KC, don’t you know he is also going to ask you to prepare a lecture Me: What??? Amita: Yes KC, he has asked Preet also. You were not in class but he was looking for you.

Now this was enough to worry me. I rushed to class and occupied the 2^nd seat. Here comes Mr. Crap, our English teacher. And wow, he discovered me in the class. I could see his EUREKA smile when he saw me sitting in 2^nd row.

Mr. Crap: Hey, where were you yesterday? Me: good after noon sir. I was not well sir. Mr. Crap: how are you now? Me: all well sir. Mr. Crap: good. I want you to prepare a lecture on a topic of our choice. You are supposed to read that lecture in front of class. Me: (no emotions) Mr. Crap: Good.

After the class ended, I had enough reason to criticize Mr. Crap. In the class of 60 students he only found 2 students and discovered me as good enough.

Bhupi: Look at Mr. Sharma. Only he can match Mr. Preet and Ms Amita. By the way man we are proud of you. Devinder: Yes, after all we can tell folks at home that our pal is a book worm.

Both guys laugh. I crib. Anyway there is nothing like problem in my dictionary. So I sit and write a long speech and start pruning it. By the end of the day I have my stuff ready. I come out my room and decide to spy on Preet Singh’s idea. That guy is brainy. He is good at English too. His schooling is from a convent school.

I just enter his room without knocking at room. No one knocks at the door in hostels. You just barge in. WHAT?? The guys is standing in front of mirror and reading his lecture loudly.

Me: Hey what are you doing? Preet: Practicing for tomorrow’s lecture. Me: Man are you crazy? Preet: No dear. This is the only way to practice for debates and lectures. Me: This is crap. Anyway. I will let you do this.

I leave him. This guy is totally crap. He never shares his assignments. Never shared his notes. And anything else. He lacks confident. I tell myself and return to room just to see my pals reading my script.

Devinder: Man this is good. Are you practicing? Me: Practicing?? Man I wrote this my self do I still need to practice? Bhupi: Hero, you need to do rehearsal. Read this loudly for me. Me: Hey cut this crap.

I give them a careless look.

Let it come and I will see it. And next day I see Amita, reading a long paper. I interrupt her, Hi Amita: Hi KC. I am preparing for lecture. Me: Kool down yaar. Nothing is going to happen Amita: No no. I know nothing is going to happened but still I am practicing. Me:???

What is wrong with this world? Where is the confidence? People lack confidence.

And the class begins.

Mr Crap: So today is our lecture day. Let’s begin with Amita.

Amita is sanding in front of class. She is reading her script easily. There is nothing big. Why the hell she was preparing for this 5 minutes job? And that book worm. Preet Singh with glasses on his eyes. Specy. He was reading his script loudly. And I don’t know when Preet Singh earned his share of claps and returned to his seat. Now suddenly every eye is searching for me.

Mr. Crap: Now last but not least. Kumar Chetan. Come on. Its your turn now. Me: Mine???

Really it was my turn now. My turn. My turn.

Get up man. I tell myself. I stand up and leave my seat. Suddenly I realize that I have left my sack full of confidence at my seat. 50 pairs of eyes looking at me. I am in front of class. My back toward black board. Mr. Crap standing on my left side. I looked at my script. Suddenly I find that the scrip is written in French language. I can’t read it. I just swallow whatever was in my mouth. The screen is totally blank in front of my eyes. My mouth is sealed. I even can not move my lips. My tongue is stuck some where in my mouth.

Mr. Crap: Now start. And at last me: Hello Friends, I can not read this script.

And I walk to my seat.

Saal-e-no mobarak

2006-03-20T06:04:00.000-08:00

Saal-e-no mobarak Sal = year no = new, same as naya in Hindi or Urdu Mobarak = simply happy To all my persian frends Click here to read more about Norouz. For my less informed friends, My love for Iran is not sudden and is due to one of my close friend but not alone due to that closeness.

HAPPY B'DAY GOLDY

2006-03-19T19:43:00.000-08:00

Today is Mr. Goldy's B'day. This Mr. Goldy is a married man. But still I call him Goldy. He is my Best Friend. HAPPY B'DAY SAINI. Kanjus Makhichuus. Saini No 1. Singer no 1. He is the only one in this universe who encouraged me to sing, rest of the world is just jealous of my voice, huh.

not in mood????

2006-03-18T23:10:00.000-08:00

Why do all this happen??? Why me? Song playing: Har Saans sualjh rahi thi ujhane ko tum a gaye Volume: 95% Haunt. GET UP MAN. You are not like that. Gather courage. Be Shameless. There is nothing like a problem in the dictionary for you. Forget. But how?

the love thing again

2006-03-17T08:20:00.000-08:00

No this time I am not going to talk again about love but some heating discussion is going on Fonzter, and all four fonzters have came with all the ideas they have. What is this Love? Is this the same thing Imraan Hashmi is doing in movies? Or the same thing that Shahrukh Khan did in DDLJ? Movies??? Are they anyway related to our lives. Yes they are related to our lives, but not with my life. People get inspired by movies. Not me. For me a movie is a movie, another way to amuse my self. But to some it means too much. Anyway. SRK and Imran are 2 stars whome any movie goer want to immitate. Imran Hashmi is a winner now a days in guys only but SRK is wat girls look for at last. Is love same thing that forced Shah Jehan to build Taj Mehal? Yes love is the same thing that forced two Ludhiana guys to throw acid on a Shimla girl. For me Love is as a complex as finding cos(0) and as simple as decoding DNA strands. The above line says it all. Love is confusing for me. Its easy to find cos(0) and scientists are still trying to efficiently decode DNA strands. Love causes confusions. Lot of confusions. The word is open for interpretation A girl if talks friendly to a guy, its interpreted as Love from girl. The girl considers you as her lost long long ago "Bhaiya" is another story. I have seen girls using this weakness of guys. Girls use guys and at when guys utter "1 4 3", girls end up saying, "I never saw you like that". I have recieved a mail which gave around 51 responses of girls. All -ve. Guys too have been doing this. Rich brats. They do the bang bang and dump the girl. Interestingly girls also fall for them repeatedly. But on the contrary if a genuine guy is approaching a girl with smile the girl will get cautious and will start collecting all assultive, read abusive, words in her brain. I have enjoyed coeducation in college. Man, the love thing is hot in college life. Every one is passing thru crushes. Its the golden period of life where guys get crush for nearly every other girl. And Girls for nearly every "Tall Dark Handsome" guy. In my case I had a crush and dont think or even ever dreamed that girls ever had crush on me. I am not "Tall Dark Handsome". I am just a simple guy. Another brick in the wall. But some outstanding bricks are my frends. I have seen them. They FELL in love.

fall: (v. t.) To Descend, either suddenly or gradually; particularly, to descend by the force of gravity; to drop; to sink; as, the apple falls; the tide falls; the mercury falls in the barometer.

Fall is a -ve word in meaning. Love causes lots of pains. Back pains sitting in front of a PC is nothing. The love thing causes, "Khoon ke ansoo" as opposed to "Dukh bhare ansoo". But then I have seen people surviving abd phase and emergng as winners. But who are those people? I support the theory that you can't fall in love in "Pehli Nazar". Love at first sight is just a marketing gimmick to promote bollywood stuff. Their is nothing like this. Love grows. It grows on a diet of honesty and trust. It matures. I have seen successful love affairs starting from a simple friendship. The friendship grew and the friends marry. Then they live happily everafter. this happily everafter comes after a period of 3-4 years. A blind date, like the one of fonzter went thru, can just act as an icebreaker. But this icebreaker gives you the best behaviour of the opposite side. Infact both sides beahve at their best. Both sides dress up well. Show all the etiquettes. Paying bills opening doors and lots of other stuff. Crap. I have never dated any one else but I am sure I will suck on my first date. I wont pay the bills. I wont open the door. I wont even pay attention to dress. Even worst, I will be casually dressed. T-Shirts and Denims with sandals. May be I will gorw beard also. Lets not promote Kumar Chetan. My point is simple. If you love me, you love me. Not my dresses. Not to the point that I am not paying your or even my bills. Not even to my face. Now this love is hard to find. This world is materialistic. One of fonzter said very true thing. I will quote what he said.

Let me tell you there’s nothing called love. It’s all just a game. You meet her, you like her, you talk to her. What follows is a few cups of coffee, bags of chips, gallons of ice cream and some popcorns. If you’re lucky enough you get laid within the first couple of weeks. After that, it’s time for goodbyes. She suddenly discovers that you have negative points and it’s the same girl who used to believe you were the best man on the planet a few weeks ago!

I have highlighted one of the line. This is what love has become no. Any one can tell this is not Love but Lust. And this lust is the honeymoon period of so called love. Then saturation comes. People get "bored" of the partner. They try to find wayouts. Result is breakup. Suddenly the guys and gals find that their partner is a bitch or a dog. FYI a dog is more faithful than any other mammal in this whole universe. I had my fair part of rejection, backstabbing and all those embarrassments which one can have in college life. All I can say is love and frendship lasts longer in males rather than in females or males and females. Of all the people I know these are just males who can tell me that guy is my frend since my college days. Females get married and loose touch with their frends. Not their fault. Still issue is love. Lets conclude it. Love is painful. But the moments of joy it gives can take away the pain of whole life time. But then again its an expensive deal.

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2006-03-17T00:43:00.000-08:00

The creativity is up for sale. Hire me for writing your blogs and all other stuff. I can write love letters, technical articles and lengthy useless posts. Click here to see live example of my work. My esteemed client Ms. Vanathi is benefitting from my services. Charges are 18US$ per article of 250-300 words. Be quick to avoid rush. I accept payments thru Bank Drafts, Credit Card and Cash. You can also pay me online using Paypal. No cheques please. Note: I can not write poems.